In Response to This

…unbelievable development…

Kerry Pressing Swift Boat Case Long After Loss
John Kerry starts by showing the entry in a log he kept from 1969: “Feb 12: 0800 run to Cambodia.”

…I’m dusting off this fun and educational Swilling exercise. Comments are open, as we may be adding chapters. To recap and refresh…

Now, for My Proposal and it’s rules of engagement:
1) We are writing a draft screenplay called ‘Smoke on the Water:A Cambodian Christmas‘. (His life being so full of epic moments, I felt the prudent move is to limit it to just this one.)
2) Please keep your narrative/yarn to at most short paragraph. Pick up the action where the previous poster left off and contribute your own flights of fancy for this riveting saga.
3) Use all of your imagination. And as little foul language as possible, a challenge considering the subject matter. Decorative and artful cursing in the course of conversation between players is not expressly prohibited.
Pencils and legal pads at the ready? Grand!
Now have at it and remember, it’s a (Cambodian) jungle out there.

To get you in the mood, I’m including a link to John Kerry’s Bad Rap at no additional charge.

Killed For Wearing Shorts

You know, just when you thought those idiots couldn’t get stupider, you read something like , ahref=”http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2006/tennis/05/27/iraq.killings.ap/index.html”>this:

BAGHDAD, Iraq (AP) — An Iraqi tennis coach and two of his players were killed because they were wearing shorts, apparently in violation of a warning by Islamic extremists.
Gunmen stopped the car in which the athletes were riding and asked them to step out before shooting them Wednesday, Manham Kubba, secretary general of the Iraqi Tennis Union, said Saturday. The coach, Hussein Ahmed Rashid, was Sunni, and the two players were Shiite, Kubba said.

What a bunch of barbaric animals.
What’s in store for MPs who wear cat suits?

Sodom and Gonorrhea

How do you tell the kids Granny’s a tramp and Pappy is an old horndog?
R-E-T-I-R-E-M-E-N-T ain’t what it used to be.

I Have An Explanation For This

Robertson Says He Leg-Pressed 2,000 Pounds
…According to the CBN Web site, [Pat] Robertson worked his way up to lifting a ton with the help of his physician, who is not named. The posting does not say when the lift occurred, but a CBN spokeswoman released photos to The Associated Press that she said showed Robertson lifting 2,000 pounds in 2003, when Robertson was 73. He is now 76.

…but I’m sure most won’t be interested as it has to do with a$$holes, clenching and jaw strength and not righteous, ‘God given’ anythings like long hair or babes at wells.

Scottie Blogging

Ozzie has apparently forgiven Mom and Dad for plopping him in puppy prison.

Aunt Kcruella sent him this beautiful new Polo to wear and he forgot all about being trapped in a cell with his sister for 6 days.
If only world peace was so easy.

This

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When You Think of All the Conniving B$ They Pull on the Show…

…why is it news when they turn out to be weasels in real life?

A former winner on “Survivor” lied to get time off from his job as a state highway worker to join a promotional tour for the reality TV show in Europe last year, an investigation found.
…After his requests for time off were denied, he submitted a false doctor’s excuse saying he was suffering from anxiety and depression and needed a month of medical leave, ODOT’s investigation found.
ODOT said Daugherty’s initial requests were refused because he had already used all but 29 hours of his vacation days, sick leave and personal time. Officials said he even submitted a request for military leave — despite never being in the armed services — because the “Survivor” tour was scheduled to visit a military base in Germany.

Yeah and they’d walk past your gasping a$$ to summit Everest, too, but they’re big ratings winners!

The New 7 WTC

The first new building at the WTC site, 7, has opened.

The 1.7 million-square-foot, $700 million building stands out downtown largely because it does not stand out. Its glass curtain facade is made of ultra-clear, low-iron glass, making it appear much lighter in color than any of the area’s surrounding buildings. Behind the glass, curved stainless-steel spandrels reflect sky-like blue light back onto the windows.

It’s pretty neat looking. I took this on Tuesday:

So Will He Practice What He…Practiced?

So poor old Dr. Death is dying in prison.

May 26, 2006 — Today, on his 78th birthday, Jack Kevorkian, the man known as “Dr. Death,” is slowly dying in prison.
And, according to his lawyer, Kevorkian seems to have second thoughts about helping people die.
For years, Kevorkian was the center of a national debate around the highly controversial questions surrounding physician-assisted suicide or “mercy killing:” Do the terminally ill have the right to choose when and how they die? Do doctors have the ability, even an obligation, to help them die as they choose?
Now, as he sits in jail, Kevorkian may have had a change of heart — not about his dedication to the “death with dignity” movement, but on how he went about promoting it.

I’m not really concerned about his change of heart on his tactics, but rather, since

Less than a week ago, Morganroth publicly stated that doctors had told Kevorkian he had less than a year to live.
Kevorkian suffers from Hepatitis C, which he contracted during service in Vietnam. Morganroth said Kevorkian’s liver enzyme levels were three to four times above normal — a clear signal his liver was failing.
In light of his failing health, Kevorkian has requested a commutation of his sentence, a pardon that would get him released from prison.

will he choose the path he chose for so many others?

BREAKING NEWS

UPDATE and BUMP: So far it’s “Move along, nothing to see here.” That’s a good thing if it turns out to be the case.
UPDATE REDUX: ‘Twould seem it was a construction hammer of some sort. The whole exercise might have been a “this is just a test” pain, but it’s always a plus to make sure things work as planned in real time, n’est pas? I’m sure things were learned and glitches noted regardless of the outcome.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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“This Is Not Resolved!”

I guess the point of this whole long (and subtitled) video (taped by cell phone) is never, EVER tap a fellow on the shoulder no matter how loud his cell phone conversation gets.

“…so they will stop asking tough questions.”

Blood money is pouring into Beslan. Some are spending the largesse in better fashion than others.

…Former hostage Valiko Margiyev, 57, lost his 12-year-old daughter in the tragedy. He said neighbors who received no compensation accused victims of allowing themselves to be bought – and he and his wife Svetlana adopted a child from an orphanage to spend their compensation money on.

There is a survivor of the terrorists who stormed the school ~ “the sole survivor among the 32 alleged attackers, Nur-Pashi Kulayev, who was sentenced to life in prison on Friday.” I love that “alleged” thing. Makes it all sound like a big misunderstanding. And there has been no death penalty in Russia for ten years ~ something to do with joining the Council of Europe.
The villagers want Russian officials put on trial, too, ostensively to determine who actually set the charges that did the bulk of the killing.

“Putin never answered the main question: Did most of the hostages die at the hands of the attackers or of the Russian military?”

They don’t have 9-11 style commissions there to poke and prod, grandstand and fact find. And I didn’t know until I read this that they had those questions. Being Russia, I’m not sure that they could believe the answers if they ever got them.
UPDATE: Per Lisa’s note in the comments, I challenge you to find “Muslim” anywhere in this report.

Armed And Dangerous…Not

I hope at least he had the soundtrack to “Footloose” blasting when they pulled him over:

WELLINGTON, New Zealand (AP) — An armless man stopped for speeding was driving with one foot on the steering wheel and another on the pedals, a policeman testified in court.
Colin Smith, who was born without arms and has never held a driver’s license, appeared in court Thursday charged with driving in a manner likely to be dangerous to the public.

Um, “likely” to be dangerous?
How did they cuff him?

Whoever Runs Against Mel “the Mushroom” Martinez This Time Around?

I’m voting for him. (I don’t care if it’s Scott the Hutt from Travelodge or a Broward County Wexlar type. But I AM looking like a genius, since I didn’t vote for the moron to begin with. ) Michelle Malkin has the last straw nicely covered.

S.Amdt.4188 – Specter: Managers’ amendment, a collection of amendments, including Dodd’s S.Amdt.4089 that requires local, state and federal governments to consult with Mexican counterpart authorities before commencing new construction, was PASSED on a 56 – 41 vote.
Republicans who voted for the Mexican consultation requirement:
Bennett, Bond, Brownback, Chafee, Coleman, Collins, Craig, Graham, Hagel, Lugar, Feingold, Collins, McCain, Specter, Stevens, Warner, Martinez, Murkowski, Snowe and Voinovich

Consult with Mexican authorities for what? Where to put the holes? And what happens if, say, Sheriff Jose Frijole in Yuma, who also has to get re-elected by voters who WANT A FENCE ~ and a big, high one ~ says “bite me” to the Feds y Federales?
As for El Presidente Fox in the Hen House, major dad heard John Gibson ask a few pertinent questions I thought I’d share (In the extended entry). They make sense to me. Don’t hold your breath for the answers. Apparently Sr. Fox doesn’t choose to provide any. Ever.
Time to flood the House of Representatives with firm language. Help me, Obi Wan Ke Miller! You’re my only hope.
UPDATE: All the more reason to be pi$$ed about this vote…

Mexico’s Fox Praises U.S. Immigration Vote
…Instead, he praised the Senate’s action, which would tighten border security and create a path to citizenship for many of the estimated 11 to 12 million immigrants in the country illegally.
Fox’s visit has stirred passions among the fiercest partisans in the immigration debate. Some Republican lawmakers boycotted his speech, while others attended wearing yellow buttons that said, “No mas,” which they said meant no more illegal immigration.
“Mexico has much more strict immigration laws than we do, yet they criticize us, said [CA] Assembly Republican leader George Plescia. “I don’t think that’s right.”
But Democrats embraced Fox, as did Republican Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, who is trying to regain the trust of Hispanic voters in time for the fall election.

I like that Plescia guy.

Exactly.

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Galloway Says Blair’s Murder Justified

This guy is really too much:

In an interview with GQ magazine, the reporter asked him: “Would the assassination of, say, Tony Blair by a suicide bomber – if there were no other casualties – be justified as revenge for the war on Iraq?”
Mr Galloway replied: “Yes, it would be morally justified. I am not calling for it – but if it happened it would be of a wholly different moral order to the events of 7/7. It would be entirely logical and explicable. And morally equivalent to ordering the deaths of thousands of innocent people in Iraq – as Blair did.”

Yes, we all remember the memo signed “Tony” that said “Karl says kill as many innocent people as possible. Take care of it, will you, luv?”
And this statesmenesque pronouncement is from the man who ate cat food from a bowl held by Rula Lenska…

“Honey…What Is This Bug in the New Roll of Toilet Paper?”

Subtitle: Never have sister make your Orlando hotel reservations.

They’ll suck but you’ll have stories to tell for years.
Let’s turn back the time machine to February 2, 2006. Expediadotcom spits out a reasonably priced king/non-smoking hotel reservation for major dad and myself, at a venue only 1/4 mile from Lake Eola and the weekend art fair. Who cares if it’s a pretty room, I think, since we’ll be gone all day long. Then I PAY IN FULL for said reservation at this…place.

Orlando Centroplex Travelodge
409 N Magnolia Ave
Orlando, FL 32801

Fast forward four months.

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Long Time Ago When We Were Fab

Florida Cracker has found some absolutely stunning color photographs from Imperial Russia.

This photo was taken in 1909.
Old photos like this, especially of children, always give me a bit of the willies because I know that in all likelihood all these children are dead of old age.

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Fleet Week ’06

A hearty welcome and Thank You to the service folks here in NY:

NEW YORK – Flying a huge American flag from its mast, the guided missile cruiser USS Anzio led nearly a dozen Navy ships and Coast Guard craft up New York Harbor on Wednesday to open the city’s 19th annual Fleet Week observance. Some 4,000 sailors and Marines were expected to spend time — and money — taking in Gotham’s sights and sounds over the next week.

Well, as always, they won’t be spending any money if I’m around. I’ll hit what bars I can and buy as many drinks as I can as a “thank you” to these wonderful Americans.

Possible Marine Court Martials

The system is working, and the investigation is going forward:

“If the allegations are substantiated, the Marine Corps will pursue appropriate legal and administrative actions against those responsible,” said Col. David Lapan, a spokesman at Marine Corps headquarters.
“The investigations are ongoing, therefore any comment at this time would be inappropriate and could undermine the investigatory and possible legal process,” he said. “As soon as the facts are known and decisions on future actions are made, we will make that information available to the public to the fullest extent allowable.” Murtha, an outspoken war critic and retired Marine colonel, has maintained for several weeks that the reality of the Hadithah incident was far more violent than the original reports suggested.

Maybe Murtha should just STFU and let the facts be researched?
Of course, since he’s already made up his mind to score his political points, I doubt that will happen

And Why Is It When One Searches Google Images

…for Mr. Bingley, one finds this?

Dear Florida Cracker

I’m back.

“So Why Did You Get Detention, Billy?”

“I used the word “America” to refer to the United States”:

The [Michigan] Department of Education asserts that “Americans” includes Mexicans, Canadians and others in the Western Hemisphere, so referring to U.S. residents as Americans is inappropriate. In the department’s view, “America” happens to include South, Central and North America. Accordingly, when referring to the colonial period, the state bureaucracy requires teachers to refer to “the colonies of North America” or “North Americans.” After the American Revolution, the nation is called the United States (not of America).

It is simply amazing:

What a state social studies consultant is telling educators in e-mails about using “America” and “Americans” in tests and courses:
“I have promised teachers that we would delete the use of American [when we are really ONLY referring to the United States] from the GLCEs (grade level content expectations) so that everything is consistent and correct as soon as it was feasible.”
“It is ethnocentric for the United States to claim the entire hemisphere.”
— Karen Todorov, Michigan Department of Education

I hope this department gets a major smackdown.
Update: Our Bud Gunslinger posts this link in the comments:

The Michigan Department of Education is not taking the word “America” or “American” out of the classrooms of Michigan…No such edict has gone out to school teachers across Michigan, nor will one, said State Superintendent of Public Instruction Mike Flanagan…
“These are advisory groups,” Flanagan said. “The conversations and internal communications between members of an independent association have been misconstrued as Department of Education policy. This is not a Department of Education policy, nor will it ever be our policy while I’m here. I would never approve the removal of ‘America’ or ‘American’ from our classrooms. Not on my watch.”

Thank you, Mr. Flanagan (and thank you, Guns!)

The More Things Change…

You just have to laugh, or cry if you live there:

BATON ROUGE, La. (AP) — A mock evacuation that was supposed to be part of a two-day statewide hurricane preparedness drill was canceled after a misunderstanding about who had jurisdiction over a Federal Emergency Management Agency trailer park.
The two-day statewide drill that began Tuesday was aimed at avoiding the chaos that followed last year’s deadly Hurricane Katrina…

Tell me again that we can trust that all the billions being given to these incompetent fools is not going to be flushed away?

Was The Raid On “Freezer Bill” Unconstitutional?

So now we have Hastert saying the raid by the FBI on “Freezer Bill” Jefferson’s office was “unconstitutional”

House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R-Ill.) told President Bush yesterday that he is concerned the Federal Bureau of Investigation’s (FBI) raid on Rep. William Jefferson’s (D-La.) congressional office over the weekend was a direct violation of the Constitution.
Hastert raised concerns that the FBI’s unannounced seizure of congressional documents during a raid of Jefferson’s Rayburn office Saturday night violated the separation of powers between the two branches of government as they are defined by the Constitution…
…In the Speaker’s lengthy statement, Hastert complained that the seizure of legislative papers, no matter how innocuous, was a violation of the “the principles of Separation of Powers, the independence of the Legislative Branch, and the protections afforded by the Speech and Debate clause of the Constitution.”

Well, I’m no lawyer, which sadly means I take words to mean what they actually say. Here’s the relevant clause of the Constitution:
Article 1, Section 6:

Section 6. The Senators and Representatives shall receive a compensation for their services, to be ascertained by law, and paid out of the treasury of the United States. They shall in all cases, except treason, felony and breach of the peace, be privileged from arrest during their attendance at the session of their respective Houses, and in going to and returning from the same; and for any speech or debate in either House, they shall not be questioned in any other place.

He wasn’t arrested on the floor or on his way to the floor. His office and house were searched as part of an investigation that has absolutely nothing to do with any “speech or debate” but rather an ongoing criminal case. Sorry, but all these false protests from lawmakers about how this is some ‘gross violation’ of the Constitution makes me want to search more offices. If he had been arrested or bodily searched right after or before giving some fiery anti-Chimpy speech from the House floor, then fine, I would agree that that would be clearly prohibited.
But scummy little bastards on the take need this wake up call.
Update: Michelle Malkin found his brand of bag.

They’re Lucky He Kept The Light Saber Off

Or Orlando would be missing a few cops today:

Police first saw David McCann, 30, standing in front of a bar Saturday at 2 a.m., shirt unbuttoned and yelling he was “Luke Skywalker” at passers-by, according to the incident report. An officer asked him to leave after McCann allegedly got into a verbal confrontation with two women over a bantha dating service.
McCann then allegedly charged the officer, who sprayed him in the face with an irritant. Two officers tried unsuccessfully to handcuff him as McCann wildly swung his fists, the report says.
The incident further escalated, with McCann continuing to allegedly attack officers after he was repeatedly kicked and struck with a baton. Officers also used a stun gun to attempt to subdue him.
“He continued to attack with super human strength and made no attempt to escape,” according to the report. “The Force is strong in this one,” said another officer.

Looks like he’s out of work, though:

The Orange County Jedi Academy said McCann had worked there for two years, but the district already decided before the arrest not to renew his annual contract for next year.

Homeless Jedi are becoming a real problem in some parts of Florida.