I Swear ~ Is This a Bizarro MSNBC Headline

…or what?

Guess it goes with the territory.

The Naivete Of The Anti-Americans

So it seems that, shockingly, al-Qaeda has called for attacks on oil suppliers to the US

CARACAS, Venezuela (Reuters) — Venezuela’s defense minister said Thursday that the nation would reinforce security measures after a branch of al Qaeda called for attacks on suppliers of oil to the United States.
Venezuela provides around 11 percent of U.S. oil imports despite diplomatic tensions between Caracas and Washington over leftist President Hugo Chavez’s self-styled socialist revolution.

But military advisor to El Jefe seems somewhat surprised that such measures are really needed

Luis Cabrera, a military adviser to the president, earlier had questioned the authenticity of the threat in comments published by local media.
He said it was illogical that “al Qaeda, which is against North American imperialism, would go against a state that is fighting, though in a different way, against that hegemony.”

I think that al Qaeda is against a bit more than simply “North American imperialism”, and that ‘logic’ should never be used in the same sentence as ‘al Qaeda”. But to acknowledge such would require these folks to give up the central tenet of their religion.
If America were to sink beneath the waves tomorrow, do they really think that al Qaeda and the other muslim extremist groups would say ‘yippee’ and quit their jihad?

Welcome to Today’s

…‘Washington Weasel’ winner ~ rookie Rep. Keith Ellison!

Smoking has become the hot topic on Capitol Hill.
…And in the latest installment, staffers for Rep. Keith Ellison tattled to Capitol Police that Rep. Tom Tancredo was smoking a cigar inside his congressional office.
“We already have the biggest air-purifying unit you can get, and I would be happy to try to make sure that it’s even less odiferous around here, but I’m not going to stop because we still have the right to do so,” Mr. Tancredo, Colorado Republican, told The Washington Times.
An officer investigating the report informed Mr. Ellison, Minnesota Democrat, that smoking is allowed in the private offices, the Hill newspaper first reported yesterday.
Calling his office in the Longworth building “our own little castle,” Mr. Tancredo said he would have preferred a personal visit from his next-door neighbor.

That would have been neighborly ~ the polite thing to do, even. What ill-mannered, pissy little people ~ I’ll bet there are some noses out of joint now and not from the smoke.

The Headline

…is hilarious.

French industry warns of brain drain

The article? Not so much.

If Ségolène Royal is elected president in May it will trigger an exodus of people from France’s financial and biotechnology sectors to London and other foreign cities, according to some of the country’s top business leaders.
The warning – fuelled by fears that the Socialist candidate would raise taxes for the highest earners and biggest companies – came as it emerged that the number of people fleeing the country’s onerous wealth tax doubled between 2003 and 2005.
Each day France loses two people who pay its wealth tax, representing a loss of €2.2bn ($2.9bn, £1.5bn) of taxable assets for the government in 2005, according to a senate finance committee report.
“If Ségolène Royal wins, we will go back to the situation we had with Mitterrand between 1981 and 1983. But it would be three-times worse,” said the chairman of one CAC 40 company, referring to François Mitterrand, the last leftwing president of France.

We **HEART** Swillers!

Happy Valentine’s Day, each and every one! In the spirit of the day (the ancient spirit, not the Chicago-style celebration), we’d like to open the post to poetic odes scribed by YOU, celebrating the personage who most exemplifies ‘joie de vivre’ (politics, entertainment, global warming, whatever) in your humble eyes. (A WSS to Capt. Ed) We will have a POETRY contest, you will all cast votes, the winner will be announced and awarded an authentic, good as new, “Sod Off Swampy” mug! Hot DAMN!

So, unquiver those iambic arrows and let the love shafts fly!

Muqtada al-Skeedaddle?

This is interesting if it is true

As details of the border closure became public, senior Bush administration officials said radical Shiite cleric Muqtada al-Sadr fled Iraq for Iran two to three weeks ago out of fear for his safety.
However, Iraqi sources have not confirmed this information and call it a rumor. Salah al Agaili, a spokesman for al-Sadr and a member of his parliament bloc, told CNN that al-Sadr is still in Iraq.
As recently as Thursday, al-Sadr’s office said he was in Najaf.
If he is in Iran, it is not his first trip there. Al-Sadr has made half a dozen official trips and an unknown number of personal visits to Iran in the last few years.
Senior administration sources said they believe al-Sadr fled in anticipation of the U.S. military’s troop buildup and a crackdown on militias, and because of fractures with extremist elements within his militia.

Very interesting. Going back to base to get more instructions?
Update: I see Sis posted a wee bit ahead of me. Oh well.

Has Anyone Checked the Local

…binjo ditches?

The chief U.S. military spokesman in Iraq said Wednesday that Muqtada al-Sadr has left the country and is believed to be in Iran, despite denials from the radical Shiite cleric’s supporters.

NYC School Uniform: The Burqa

Imagine the Sex Ed classes here

The Department of Education says that it will open a public school next fall dedicated to Arabic language and culture.
The Khalil Gibran International Academy is one of 40 new schools that will their debut in the city next September.
Education officials say although half the classes at the school will be taught in Arabic, they want to enroll a diverse student body.
The school is set to open in Brooklyn.

Will they have courses with titles such as “Beheading Or Stoning: A Critical Perspective”? No course list posted yet, but we’ll keep an eye on it.

Jeez Louise, I KNOW It’s 31 Pages Long!!

But READ it ANYWAY.
For the children.
UPDATE: Bypassing cranky pdf files, I give you the HTML cached version.

I Know That Rabbit Be Sayin’

…”Where Jimmay Cartah?”

“Is That Fissionable Material in Your Pocket

…or are you just glad to see me?” ‘Denial Central’ comes face-to-face with an inconvenient truth.

Iran on course for nuclear bomb, EU told
Iran will be able to develop enough weapons-grade material for a nuclear bomb and there is little that can be done to prevent it, an internal European Union document has concluded.
In an admission of the international community’s failure to hold back Iran’s nuclear ambitions, the document – compiled by the staff of Javier Solana, EU foreign policy chief – says the atomic programme has been delayed only by technical limitations rather than diplomatic pressure. “Attempts to engage the Iranian administration in a negotiating process have not so far succeeded,” it states.
…”At some stage we must expect that Iran will acquire the capacity to enrich uranium on the scale required for a weapons programme,” says the paper, dated February 7 and circulated to the EU’s 27 national governments ahead of a foreign ministers meeting yesterday.
“In practice . . . the Iranians have pursued their programme at their own pace, the limiting factor being technical difficulties rather than resolutions by the UN or the International Atomic Energy Agency.
“The problems with Iran will not be resolved through economic sanctions alone.”
The admission is a blow to hopes that a deal with Iran can be reached and comes at a sensitive time, when tensions between the US and Tehran are rising. Its implication that sanctions will prove ineffective will also be unwelcome to EU diplomats. Only yesterday the bloc agreed on how to apply United Nations sanctions on Tehran, overcoming a dispute between Britain and Spain over Gibraltar.

How do you solve a problem like a whirling nuclear dervish?
And ‘head-tilt’ on my count, in…three, two, one…

It Seems To Me She’s Been “Sacked” Too Much As It Is

Maybe his next movie will be The Australian Patient

A flight attendant accused of having sex in an aircraft toilet with actor Ralph Fiennes was in hiding last night after being grounded without pay.
Other crew members claimed Lisa Robertson had a seven-mile-high fling in business class with The English Patient star.
…Qantas has taken suggestions of a liaison seriously and has stood her down while it investigates.
She will be sacked if it finds sex did take place.
…But she said she was simply doing her job, adding: “This is common practice on long flights to build a rapport with passengers.”

Now that’s service!

You Dirty Rat

Well, I’m really not surprised they found Meth on him

EUGENE, Oregon (AP) — A snorkeler who was shot in the face after he was apparently mistaken for a swimming rodent was in good condition after surgery, a hospital said Saturday.
…William Roderick, 60, of Reedsport, has been charged with assault, being a felon in possession of a firearm, and possession of methamphetamine and marijuana. He was being held in the county jail.
Roderick told deputies he thought Cheesman was a nutria swimming in the Smith River near Reedsport, about 90 miles southwest of Eugene, and shot him with a .22-caliber rifle, police said.
A nutria is a water-dwelling South American rodent species that is larger than a muskrat but smaller than a beaver. It was introduced to U.S. waters in the 1940s, according the National Wildlife Federation.

I at least hope the guy who got shot has a full beard…

“Don’t Shoot!”

Picture That

…Marines from Golf Company said they recently fished two bodies out of the local river: a man had been decapitated, and his 4-year old tied to his leg before both were thrown into the river and the little boy drowned…

…when ‘run away’ is broached. I guarantee you those Marines will.

Ladies and Gentlemen

…the Queen !!

Muslim women don’t have to wear veils: Queen Rania
Islam does not require women to wear veils, Queen Rania al-Abdullah of Jordan has said in an interview, calling on Muslim moderates to “make their voices be heard.”
“Islam neither requires one to be practising, nor to dress in one way or another,” the stylish 36-year-old queen told the Italian daily Corriere della Sera during a visit to Rome on Friday.
“So imposing the veil on a woman is contrary to the principles of Islam,” said Queen Rania
…Queen Rania urged “all moderates to stand up and let their voices be heard.”
…”Over the last three years, most victims of terrorism have been Muslim. So there’s not a war between Muslims and non-Muslims, but between extremists and moderates of all the religions,” the queen said.
“What is important is not to live in fear. The most dangerous (thing to do) is to give up and lose hope. The main enemy is not terrorism or extremism, but ignorance,” she said.

Please Allah watch over her.
She’s going to need all the help she can get.

Mares Eat Oats and Does Eat Oats and

…Al Zedong zee divey. Is it an occident?

Or something more sinister…

Read more »

Dear Jerry Jones

Well, it sounds like you’re about to sign the caliber of coach you deserve.

Phillips reportedly to become Dallas coach
Chargers defensive coordinator apparently beats Turner, Rivera, others

A lard-assed, pinheaded loser to go with that trophy wide mouth receiver you had to have.
Have a hot time in the Big ‘D’, fellas. You’ve earned it.
Signed,
th “I will never forgive blubber butthead Bum’s Boy for f*cking over Doug is a GOD Flutie” sister

On This Day in 1587 a Different Redhead

…whacked a rival…

…who just happened to be a babe, too. (No mention in the historical record of ‘diapers’.)
What a way to get ahead.

To Stay This Cranky, I’d Have to Guess He’s Still Pissed About

…the whole Steny Hoyer thing.

…Late Wednesday afternoon, one of Pelosi’s closest allies in the House, Rep. John Murtha, D-Penn., chairman of the key Appropriations Committee subcommittee on defense, told CNN that the Pentagon was making “a mistake” by leaking information unfavorable to the speaker “since she decides on the allocations for the Department of Defense.”

Blustering gasbag.

Wa-Hoo-Wa, Baby!

I know it won’t last, but man it was nice to wake up this morning and see this:

Atlantic Coast Conference
TEAM CONF W-L
Virginia 8-2
Boston College 7-2
North Carolina 6-2
Virginia Tech 6-3
Duke 5-4
Florida State 5-4
Clemson 4-5
Georgia Tech 4-6
Maryland 3-6
North Carolina State 3-6
Miami (FL) 2-7
Wake Forest 2-8

I love this line

And now, Virginia – yes, Virginia – stands atop the standings ahead of such powerhouses as Duke and North Carolina.

It’s probably been since 1982/83 that we’ve been here this late in the season. I don’t expect it to last, but I will enjoy it while it does.

“Cake or Death?”

Cake, please. It’s his birthday.

“There’s no Church of England fundamentalism. We can’t have Church of England fundamentalism. You know, like they have Islamic fundamentalism. Jihad! … Ah ha … Church of England fundamentalism is impossible because you can’t have: “You must have tea and cake with the vicar or you die!” Tea and cake or death! Students with beards, “Tea and cake or death! Tea and cake or death! Little Red Cookbook! Little Red Cookbook!” Ca – you know, ’cause, “Cake or death?” That’s a pretty easy question. Everybody – anyone could answer that. “Cake or death?” “Uhh, cake please.” “Very well! Give him cake!” “Oh, thanks very much. It’s very nice!” “You! Cake or death?” “Uh, cake for me, too, please!” “Very well! Give him cake, too! We’re gonna run out of cake at this rate. You! Cake or death?” “Uh, death, please. No, cake! Cake! Cake, sorry. Sorry …” “You said death first, ah-ha, ah-ha, death first!” “Well, I meant cake!” “Oh, all right. You’re lucky I’m Church of England! Cake or death?” “Uh, cake please.” “Well, we’re out of cake! We only had three bits and we didn’t expect such a rush! So what’ll it be?”
“What, so my choice is ‘or death?’ Well, then I’ll have the chicken, please.”“

And All This Time I Thought ‘Bingley’

…was a nom de plume? ‘Twould appear someone knows him.

“For the past 10 years at least, the conservative movement has been dominated by a bunch of pudgy, pasty-faced kids in bow ties and blue blazers who spent their youths playing Risk in Gothic dormitories while sipping port and smoking their fathers’ stolen cigars.”

If they’d said ‘scotch’, it’d be a fer sure.

Did Anyone Else See Bashar al-Assad on World News Tonight Last Night?

Gosh. He seems like such a nice guy. And Diane was really tough…

Sawyer: But in America they believe that you are all powerful, and you say the word and the border [crossings into Iraq] will stop.
Assad: Powerful is different from being omnipotent — power that you can control everything completely. You cannot control your border with Mexico, can you? You’re the greatest power in the world, you cannot control it with Mexico, so how do you want Syria to control its border with Iraq?

….(Oooo, ZING!) and you still just wound up wanting to hug him.
I think Forest Whitaker should play him in the movie version.

You Can’t Have It Both Ways

You either hand out money willie-nillie in the aftermath of a natural disaster or you keep track of where it’s going and get tarred with the ‘racist, class warrior’ brush.

In the neighborhood President Bush visited right after Hurricane Katrina, the U.S. government gave $84.5 million to more than 10,000 households. But Census figures show fewer than 8,000 homes existed there at the time.
Now the government wants back a lot of the money it disbursed across the region.
The Federal Emergency Management Administration has determined nearly 70,000 Louisiana households improperly received $309.1 million in grants, and officials acknowledge those numbers are likely to grow.

Can you imagine that! People got money they didn’t rate when the till was open and the dollars flying out like honeybees on their way to fragrant fields.
Oh, well, hell ~ who we kiddin’ here? You get tarred, don’t make no nevermind what you do.

Mayor Ray Nagin told a Senate committee Monday he doesn’t see the will to fix his hurricane-battered city when compared with the billions spent on the war in Iraq.
“I think it’s more class than anything, but there’s racial issues associated with it also,” Nagin said.

Race, schmace. And as for class…what would Nagin know about that anyway? He’s certainly never shown any.
So let’s just leave the lucre levee open…

Gov. Kathleen Blanco said Monday that she will ask leaders on Capitol Hill this week to release Louisiana from about $1.7 billion in debt that the state owes to cover the local match for federal recovery grants and repayment of disaster loans.
…Further, Blanco said she will request forgiveness for roughly $1 billion in community disaster loans that were awarded to local governments so they could keep operating in the wake of unprecedented devastation brought by Hurricane Katrina in 2005. Kopplin said the White House traditionally has converted those loans to grants, ostensibly giving disaster-ridden governments free cash for operations.
…While criticizing the rules governing FEMA reimbursements, Blanco announced a pair of initiatives aimed at speeding up the notoriously laggard process of getting federal dollars to local agencies working restore basic services.
…”I think we’re going to have some luck in Congress,” Blanco said. “If we don’t, God help us all.“

…and watch it all drain away. Rules be damned! Accountability be damned! Let’s free ourselves from those fiscal chains of integrity that bind! Waste, fraud and entitlement are New Orleans’ peculiar institutions and who are we to naysay their right to unlimited funds unhampered by unreasonable restraint?
‘Free cash‘ it says? Well, then, free cash it should be!
No one could doubt our good intentions then. Not even the cannibals.

When in Doubt…

…REHAB !!
In that time honored recent tradition of ‘everything stupid and hateful I do is because of my underlying addictive personality and NOT the fact of my weaselness’ ~ traveling in the vaunted footsteps plowed through the detritus of their personal loser lives ~ emulating such weasel rehab pioneers before him, like Miss USA, Patrick Kennedy, Isaiah Washington, Jim McGreevey (“More than a coming-out memoir, The Confession is the story of one man’s quest to repair the rift between his public and private selves, at a time in our culture when the personal and political have become tangled like frayed electric cables. Teeming with larger-than-life characters, written with honesty, grace, and rare insight into what it means to negotiate the minefields of American public life, it may be among the most honest political memoirs ever written.“)…the San Francisco playboy, the City by the Bay Mayor who looks enough like McGreevey to be his hetero hound dog brother…is headed to rehab.

Mayor Gavin Newsom said Monday that he plans to seek counseling for alcohol use, following the disclosure that he had an affair with the wife of a trusted aide.
Newsom, 39, said that although “my problems with alcohol are not an excuse for my personal lapses in judgment,” he had stopped drinking and wanted professional help staying sober.
“Upon reflection with friends and family this weekend, I have come to the conclusion that I will be a better person without alcohol in my life,” Newsom said in a statement.

Of course you will, you smarmy, revolting lizardoid.