Ah, There They Are!

I just knew I’d left them lying around somewhere

The Russian army is embroiled in an embarrassing scandal after 200 of its tanks were found abandoned near a forest in central Russia, unguarded and unlocked.

A news website near the city of Yekaterinburg posted a video of the forgotten tanks showing passers-by clambering inside the vehicles and playing with empty ammunition belts. The only items that seemed to be missing were live rounds and the keys to the tanks’ ignitions.

“There are tanks all over the forest, abandoned,” an unnamed reporter on the video says. “If you need one, come and get it.”

I could use one for my drive to the bus stop. The Parkway can get pretty rough sometimes.

8 Responses to “Ah, There They Are!”

  1. Skyler says:

    Keys to the ignition? I find it very hard to believe.

  2. Skyler says:

    “Comrade, drive your tank over the Czechloslavakian counter revolutionaries in the street.”

    “Da, Comrade Captain. I will. Just as soon as I get the keys from the motor pool.”

    “Why didn’t you get them before, Comrade?”

    “But I did, Comrade Captain. I was issued the correct keys last night.”

    “Then where are they, Comrade?”

    “Comrade Captain, I don’t know. Last night the motor pool told me they were the correct keys, but this morning they don’t fit. I know that the Comrade Lieutenant would not have made an error. Errors are contrary to proper party discipline.”

    “I guess the invasion of Czechloslavakia must be delayed until the counter revolutionaries who switched the key last night can be found.”

  3. Syd says:

    …and I feel stupid when I lose my keys.

  4. Gary from Jersey says:

    Reminds me of the Russian Air Force colonel who sold a fleet of maybe 10 MiGs in ’91 or ’92. Somebody wanted them, he sold them then parked them on a highway outside the gate. Nothing happened to him.

  5. JeffS says:

    Tanks don’t have ignition keys. At least, not the tanks that I’m familiar with.

  6. Rob says:

    Sounds like a party. Bumper cars anyone?

  7. Mr. Bingley says:

    gawd, that’s a brilliant idea, Rob.

    I’ll bring a couple of cases of beer…

  8. Gunslinger says:

    Perhaps a Russian armored brigade got bored one weekend and decided to host a LARP version of Command and Conquer?

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