BREAKING NEWS

New Orleans Mayor Trapped in Rising Floodwaters

New Orleans, LA – After claiming victory in a pitched battle for control of the city with fascist, unelected federal officials, Mayor R.A. Noggin has found himself trapped on the last short bus out of town. In a move worthy of Moses, he had stubbornly gathered his scattered citizens unto him to repopulate the Crescent City, only to find himself rapidly agreeing that buses should be used before they get wet, not after.
“I’ll be hot-damned”, Hizzoner said. “That sh$t comes up quick! And it stanks, too. Now, somebody needs to call that fat little Coast Guard admiral and tell him send a helicopter.”
General Russell Honore, when queried about the dire situation, was quoted as saying “I called in the Stupid Street address where they’re stuck. That’s as much as we can do. Stanky flood water makes it a Coast Guard show.”
Vice Admiral Thad Allen was unavailable for comment.

©2005 TOWACA PRESS INTERNATIONAL


And YES, that COPYRIGHT means we’re the f@cking idiots who wrote it and it ALL BELONGS TO ONLY US. Use it without a link or a thank you and we’ll sic Aztec Gods on you.
Bhuwahahahahaa!!!!
Thank you for your support.

18 Responses to “BREAKING NEWS”

  1. Nightfly says:

    I’d check the BSartist site every ten minutes just to be safe.

  2. Lisa says:

    I’ll admit you got me. Hahahahahaaha! Good one.

  3. I saw that “short bus” and just thought ‘bwahahahahha!!! Couldn’t resist ~ I had the shot, there was no danger.

  4. Ken Summers says:

    Shouldn’t Sean Penn be there with his Red Cup?

  5. Cullen says:

    That was awesome. Thanks.

  6. Cindermutha says:

    Bwaahaahaahaaa! Now that’s funny!

  7. Ryne says:

    This is the funniest damn thing I’ve read in a long time.

  8. Hot damn, Ryne!
    A warm welcome to the Swilling and thank you!
    (It’s one thing to amuse the hell out of ourselves, but if someone else thinks we’re funny, well…that’s pret-tee hot DAMN cool! {:^P )

  9. Mayor Ray

    Makes a break for it.
    The photo is priceless.

  10. DANEgerus says:

    Sorry… but I’ve got ‘prior works’ that invalidates your CopyRight…
    I can only assume the short bus… is for Nagin(D).
    This of course means you will be condemned to walk the planet in death, deathless, until you break your own Aztec curse by posting a naked picture of Keira Knightley.

  11. DANEgerus says:

    Or at least it would be ‘prior works’ if I used the time on Lee’s link to you…
    Great… now I have to find a naked picture of Keira Knightly…

  12. Glad you talked yourself out of that. We’d have hated to have to send guys with feathered clubs and tongue studs after you. (Then again, a naked picture of Keira Knightley comes close to that sort of horrific image…)

  13. GetALifeAgain says:

    This is HILARIOUS. And not a one time laugh; everytime I see it and read it I’m on the floor!

  14. GALA, we live to serve {;^p and thank you, Faith! What a hoot to make you all laugh! We’ll have to do this more often.

  15. joated says:

    So, is the mayor in the “tart cart” (that’s what the kids call the short buses), ’cause I can’t quite see him.

  16. Yup. He’s hanging out and keeping his powder dry, waitin’ on a rescue. Or a TV camera…

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