Conjunction Junction, What’s Your Function?

Lopping off hands and fingers and toesies

Up to 5,000 pupils attending weekend schools across Britain are being exposed to textbooks claiming that some Jews were transformed into pigs and apes, and that some offences could be punished with stoning. One book for six year-olds warns that those who do not believe in Islam will be condemned to “hellfire” in death.

Another text for 15 year-olds teaches that thieves who break Sharia law should have their hands cut off for a first offence and their feet amputated for a subsequent crime. Teenagers are presented with diagrams showing where the cuts should be made.

This reminds me of a very old SNL skit where John Belushi was being held captive in some barbarian village and the judge said “Hmmm, let’s see. We got off your right hand when we arrested you for pickpocketing and we cut out your tongue when we convicted you of blasphemy. Now what should the penalty be for your current crime of adultery…”

But since these school sessions are in Jolly Olde England and and it involves, er, Presbyterian texts I’m sure the government will roll over and Prince Charles will appear on BBC1 and talk about “understanding.”

And we’ll see lots of things like this

The Saudi Ambassador told the BBC it was “dangerously deceptive and misleading” to discuss some of the texts outside of context.

Because, hey, you know, them Juice do want to take over the world and drink our blood, right?

9 Responses to “Conjunction Junction, What’s Your Function?”

  1. major dad says:

    Londonstan, it’s coming.

  2. JeffS says:

    Yeah, and very soon.

    Farewell, England.

  3. A quick glance a history will show the rise and fall of countries, kingdoms and empires. Few were overrun by external enemies. Farewell, Britain, you had a nice run.

  4. Mr. Bingley says:

    Hi Helena!

    Is your sister Hellen Whiels by chance?

  5. Jim - PRS says:

    If we’re not resolute, that could be our future.

  6. Gunslinger says:

    Should be interesting to see if atheists will screech as loudly in the face of islam being snuck into a schools lesson plans like they screech at the mere thought of the words “God” or “Jesus” spoken out loud in schools.

  7. Kathy Kinsley says:

    Oh – and not with any positive slant either.

  8. Larry says:

    Death to zionist juice!
    Grape and orange are still OK though.

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