Damn You Chimpy!


If Sean Penn gets cancer, it’s your fault!

Welcomed with a standing ovation, Cindy Sheehan and co-founder of Gold Star Families for Peace gave a rousing talk. She stressed the need to impeach this administration as war criminals who continue to lie to the American public about pre-war Iraq intelligence. She also contends that Pres. Bush’s assertions about pulling the U.S. troops out of Iraq would lead to chaos are a part of a calculated strategy to mislead the American public. Cindy reminded the audience that we all need to take responsibility for Iraq—as we elected the officials who ultimately allowed the invasion and occupation. We have the power to remove them from office. Cindy emphasized we must exit Iraq now to save precious lives. After expressing her support for a Dept. of Peace, Cindy concluded that she’d like to create a U.S. Dept. of History, with herself as the first secretary.
Actor Sean Penn added to the enthusiasm of the day by stressing that all of the nation’s anti-war activism was taking hold and was starting to work—while admitting that the stress of living under the current administration was making it tough for him to quit smoking. Stating that he “was not a pacifist on the inside”, he was moved to be one on the outside for the sake of his children and grandchildren’s future. He said we have to fight for everything we have.

Update: Dave E in comments:

“Guess I picked the wrong Presidency to quit sniffing glue.”

16 Responses to “Damn You Chimpy!”

  1. Lisa says:

    Oh, puke.
    “Dept. of Peace?” What is this, Montessori School? Will there be a Secretary of Milk and Cookies?

  2. Ken Summers says:

    Gawd what a frickin’ pussy

  3. Susanna says:

    Awww, poor Sean Penn.
    Perhaps he can sue Big Gov’t (in lieu of Big Tobacco)?

  4. Stating that he “was not a pacifist on the inside”, he was moved to be one on the outside for the sake of his children and grandchildren’s future. He said we have to fight for everything we have.

    Is anyone else’s Ironymeter pegged at 11 on that one?

  5. The_Real_JeffS says:

    OK, I gotta ask…..when did Mommy Cindy grow a beard?

  6. Emily says:

    Right. The guy who’s clubbed more photographers than Carter has liver pills feels it is necessary for him to explain to everyone that he is not a pacifist. Um, Sean, we kind of figured that. Especially since you didn’t seem to have any problem with war when it was being waged by Mr. Clinton.

  7. The_Real_JeffS says:

    Or when the war was waged by Saddam Hussein.

  8. Emily says:

    Exactly. Why don’t these people just be honest and come out and call themselves Gold Star Families Against War But Only When Waged By Republicans?

  9. Suzette says:

    My husband uses exactly the same excuse whenever we talk about his quitting smoking – claims I make him nervous! Wait til he finds out that he’s thinking like Sean Penn.

  10. Emily says:

    How much does anyone here want to bet that if Penn gets cancer/emphysema/any other smoking related sickness, he’s going to blame Bush?
    I say twenty bucks.

  11. Ken Summers says:

    You better be giving some good odds, Emily

  12. Dave E says:

    Guess I picked the wrong Presidency to quit sniffing glue.

  13. Ken Summers says:

    Ha! Dave nails it!

  14. Mr. Bingley says:

    Hahahahahaha! Indeed.

  15. Nightfly says:

    bwahahahahaha! Nice, Dave.

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