Filed Under: Why Celebrities ALWAYS Know What’s Best for Us

…and why they tell us so often.
Because they’re deep, people. Deep people. Smart and DEEP, like the deepest blue of Gwinnie’s eyes, but deeper than that. Deep like the ocean, but only DEEPER. Deeper than the deep happiness she felt when we all voted for Obama because she told us to, but, like even DEEPER. Like deepitydeepdeepdeep DEEP DEEPER.
But deeper than that.

…In a new interview which is sure to irk her American fans, Gwyneth belittles her native country’s 223 years of history compared to the older nation of Spain.
The Oscar winner fell in love with the country when she spent a month living with a family in Talavera de la Reina in central Spain when she was 15.
Speaking in Spanish, she said: ‘When I was 15, I went to a small town outside Talavera de la Reina and I had the most wonderful experience. It really changed my life.
‘Spain became a second home. It is so different from the United States. It seemed to have a history, and the buildings are years and years and years old.

‘Here in the United States an old building is about 17 (years old), and over there it’s from 500 B.C., it’s incredible…’

**fans self** “Incredible”, indeed!
I read her words and feel something deep, too…rumbling in my bowels.
Excuse me for a minute.

19 Responses to “Filed Under: Why Celebrities ALWAYS Know What’s Best for Us”

  1. major dad says:

    She’s a twit, good, stay in Spain and STF up.

  2. Skyler says:

    Well, I admit that if I weren’t able to live in the US, my next choice would be Spain even though I don’t even speak Spanish. It’s a beautiful country with fabulous food and very feminine and gorgeous women. And Gwyn is right, the history is amazing. Most of it is very hideous and evil history, but it is quite old.
    But that’s mostly because I imagine myself being left alone and no one bothering me. I don’t suppose that would be possible in reality.
    But I would always choose the USA first because we have a better culture. Their culture may be older, but ours is freer. Despite our politicians!

  3. From 500 BC? In Spain? Not too many of those still standing, I’d wager.
    OTOH, there are some pueblos here that may well date back that far.

  4. I’m sure they’re Roman if anything, Mr. Summers. And you’re darn right about our pueblos ~ the Anasazis alone made their appearence around 1200 B.C. and they were building fools, but whadda we know?
    She, on the otherhand, is deep…ly vapid and vacuous.

  5. And we will happily ignore you, Skyler, if that is truly what you want. We live to serve!

  6. JeffS says:

    Geez, does she think her opinion rulz the world still? A sanctimonious twit remains a sanctimonious twit, no matter how many Oscars said twit is given by an organization devoted to twits like her.

  7. Retread says:

    I’ve enjoyed several visits to England, and enjoyed learning more about the history of the country while visiting, but the USA is home and I’m always glad to get home.
    England threw out an immigrant ancestor of mine in 1732, I’m proud of that;).

  8. Mr. Bingley says:

    I saw this earlier today and I was too busy retching to post on it.

  9. JeffS says:

    Yeah, Mr. Bingley, Gwyneth is like cheap booze, ain’t she?

  10. Dave J. says:

    My time in Spain is limited to Barcelona: it is a magnificent city, but of course the Catalans do not exactly consider themselves Spanish. And as for age, American self-government is ten times older than Spain’s, a country where fascist dictatorship is a thing of living memory.
    The best thing I can personally think of to say about Gwyneth Paltrow is…she has a surprisingly good singing voice. Seriously, I loved her duet cover of Smokey Robinson’s “Cruisin'” with Huey Lewis.

  11. I’m sure they’re Roman if anything, Mr. Summers.
    I think that would predate even Roman presence by about 300 years.

  12. GOOP says:

    I actually like Spain!! The men are gorgeous, the people dress well, their lives are indeed more relaxed, the people are kind but I prefer living in the United States thank you very much.

  13. Skyler says:

    Dave, it would be unfortunate to think that the Spanish liked being under a fascist boot. Many of those people fought very hard to prevent it. Sadly, most of those were being controlled by communists and the rest had such screwy out of this world ideas on governance that they were unable to fight effectively. It’s a very tragic story, they deserve more sympathy than scorn for the resulting Franco regime. A better testament is that they were able to change the entire government peacefully upon Franco’s death.
    My friend in Spain told me that five hundred years is nothing. “It’s only five people.” It’s a perspective that I find very interesting and full of hope.

  14. Mr. Bingley says:

    Skyler, I don’t think Dave is at all saying that the Spanish “liked” being under the fascist boot; it however is simply undeniable that it ended a mere 30 years ago and would have returned in 1981 had the coup succeeded (a coup which failed in large part to the courage of Juan Carlos).

  15. Mr. Bingley says:

    “Gwyneth is like cheap booze, ain’t she?”
    That’s rather unkind to economical spirits, don’t you think?

  16. Mr. Bingley says:

    Gwyneth belittles her native country’s 223 years of history…
    I guess I’m lacking her deepening sense of historical deepitude, in a shallow, non-deep sort of way, but I seem to have missed the importance of 1786 in the depths of my undeep schooling.

  17. John says:

    I dunno. Maybe we should cut her some slack. I was 19 the first time I went to the USSR, and when I came back I said stupid shit like that. Seeing stuff you only read about in books for the first time does tend to strike the teenaged brain deeply.
    Oh but wait, she’s not a teenager, is she? She just acts like one. She’s what, 40? By this time in her life she should have realized Skyler’s point: much of that history reflects a cruel and ossified system that Europe broke out of only because its best and brightest emigrated here to operate in freedom, then exported modern democracy back to the Old World.
    I used to buy into the Russian praise for their great literary traditions as the sign of a great culture until I realized that it is true that great art requires suffering, and much of the inspiration for the great Russian authors came from their suffering at the hands of the Tsars and Commies. When you realize that Saint Basil’s Cathedral in Red Square was built by a man so evil his own people called him Ivan the Terrible, some of the shine comes off the 500 year old gilt on the onion domes.

  18. Skyler says:

    One of the by-products of “winning” the cold war is that there is no longer a perceived threat from communism. Too many people have already forgotten its evils and now the ideological communism of Obama and Ayers is being welcomed in this country because it is no longer burdened by that living example of the inevitable result of trying to apply that ideology.
    I think it’s safe to say that we actually have, in the end, lost the cold war. And Gwynnie and her ilk are the useful idiots that made it possible.

  19. Steve Skubinna says:

    What building in Spain dates back to 500 BC? I don’t think you can find anything in Italy that old (unless you can locate Romulus’ hut). Even Greece would be hard pressed to produce a structure from then.
    Oh, right, she’s an idiot. Okay, fine then. What she’s gettng at is there are buildings there that are, like, a million years old. Whoa!
    And as for Spain and Franco, bitter as this is to say, the “right” side probably won the Spanish Civil War. Look at the Warsaw Pact nations and imagine Spain being like that, ten years earlier.

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