Thank Odin Al Gore Invented the Inner Webs!!

Because it gives Yahoo a chance ~ for those who covet a Cordon Bleu chef’s toque blanche, or see themselves as an aspiring Iron Chef ~ to break down, in simple terms, that most TERRIFYING OF EPICURIAN MOUNTAINS TO CLIMB:

How to cut up a real chicken wing.

(Like, one you got from a grocery store meat counter, not out of a T.G.I. Friday’s Buffalo Wing bag. They helpfully include a picture of a naked, intact chicken wing so one can recognize said foreign creature, and include a full description of all parts of said wing de poulet.)

Now the guide is (I shit you not.):

How to Prep Chicken Wings for Appetizers

…and covers just “cutting it up” into 3 pieces. Not cooking it, slathering it with goo, or anything else.

Just. Cutting. It. Up.

We live in an age of MORONS.

Know how I know? NOwhere do they discuss EVER rinsing the chicken pieces first, and then scrupulously washing YOUR hands, the tools you used, and ALL SURFACES the nasty little salmonella, et al, laden wings-now-in-three-pieces touched THOROUGHLY with anti-bacterial soap and water afterwards.

So they should all die before they have a chance to breed anyway.

Whew.

categories Fun, Media, Swill Food and Grog | | datetime February 4, 2012 11:56 am

5 Responses to “Thank Odin Al Gore Invented the Inner Webs!!”

  1. AliceH says:
    February 4, 2012 at 12:32 pm

    Read the comments!!!

    There are 3,082 of them. A very small selection from the first page of them:

    “I think this article got cut off, where’s the part where you make them?”

    “How do I get the wings out of the bag? Please help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

    “Coming to a theater near you ! ‘ How to open a bag of chips ‘”

    and they get better… 🙂

  2. JeffS says:
    February 4, 2012 at 12:44 pm

    Every time something like this happens, I think of C. M. Kornbluth, and wonder how he knew…..

    And then I read the reaction to stupid stuff like this, including:

    love these comments…almost makes up for the article.

    And I am heartened.

    But take note…..that article was posted less than 1 day ago, and there are over 3000 comments. If the first couple dozen are a good sample, most folks agree, the article is STUPID.

  3. JeffS says:
    February 4, 2012 at 12:49 pm

    By the way, if you want to see what C. M. Kornbluth had to say about morons, here’s the story.

  4. Mori says:
    February 5, 2012 at 10:17 pm

    Isn’t it easier to have the chickens disassemble themselves?

  5. Dave E. says:
    February 6, 2012 at 2:36 pm

    Hey, is this one of those jobs that Americans won’t do?

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