A Moment of Eyeball Rolling Disgust

Does anybody besides me have a problem with a twice divorced mother of three wearing the whole white schlmear for wedding number three? I know we should all expect tackytackytacky, but God, wouldn’t it be refreshing if they surprised us once in a while?

15 Responses to “A Moment of Eyeball Rolling Disgust”

  1. Mr. Bingley says:

    I didn’t realize they were kabballah weirdos, too. Geesh.

  2. Suzette says:

    I think that the bridal industry RELIES on the repeat business of those who can afford the whloe magilla. Young first-timers are getting smarter these days and foregoing the expensive traditional trappings. We’re seeing more and more of the clam-bake-on-the-beach kind of thing. What would a poor wedding planner do without the likes of serial brides like Demi, Jennifer, Liz and Liz.

  3. Suzette, do you know I found one, last bastion of ‘first time brides ONLY’ holdouts; the ‘blusher’ veil.

    Another old tradition, or etiquette rule, stated that second brides couldn’t wear veils. Today, brides may wear a veil, but stick to one that’s simple and again, appropriate for your style of wedding. Blusher veils (over the face) are still reserved only for first brides.

    Most of the wedding sites try to steer a 2d, 3d or 8th time bride in the ‘classic, mature’ vein, but wind up saying ‘whatever floats your boat’ in the end. No backbone.

  4. were kabballah weirdos, too
    Uh, yeah, which is why Daddy Bruce said “keep our kids away from your religion.” (Another dad who knows when to speak up where his daughters are concerned.)

  5. Emily says:

    That’s Kabbalah poseurs, thank you very much. According to its own rules, Kabbalah isn’t supposed to be practiced or studied by women and men aren’t allowed to pursue it until they are middle aged.

  6. Oh, you ARE kidding me…that’s even tackier. Break the rules about the dress, break the rules about the religion, break dancing…what’s next in this wild and crazy world???
    I was telling Bingley I’d read somewhere that the LA kabbalah center guru had mentioned that the fellow officiating at the ‘ceremony’ was welcome to do so, but he wasn’t any registered kabbalah sensei that they were aware of.

  7. Emily says:

    The Berg family are nothing but a bunch of greedy charlatans exploiting people’s spiritual desires for money. They dupe idiots like Madonna…oh, excuse me, I mean Esther… out of millions so they can live like kings.

  8. Well, the lady who used to channel ‘Ramtha’ has kind of fallen off the map, so it was just a matter of time before someone else stepped in to take the bucks and dispense spiritual bliss.

  9. NJ Sue says:

    The problem with white dresses for many “experienced” brides is a practical one, in my opinion: head-to-toe white tends to wash one out and make one look like Moby Dick. Only the young and the slim can really look good (or not bad) in a big ol’ white dress.

  10. kcruella says:

    What, there’s a problem w/ spending 35.00 on a red string and 5.00 on a bottle of water that can cure cancer???
    As for the white dress thing, just bartended a wedding complete with white princess gown, veil and full bridal party. The couple had lived together for over ten years and had 3 kids. That’s about the fifth one this year.

  11. Nightfly says:

    Eh. A resounding So What from this corner of the Web.
    Ashton looks ridiculous in that hat, BTW, and I’m still waiting for Bruce to pop out of some hallway with a realistic-looking prop gun, shouting “Yippi-ki-yay you little mofo!” and then popping a thousand blanks into the air while all of AK’s pals from That 70s Show yell “PUNK’D!”

  12. Curtis says:

    I was thinking the same thing. That would be absolutely hysterical.
    My wife and I were talking about the whole white dress thing the other day. We didn’t think anyone even paid attention to that sort of thing anymore. Of course this is coming from a couple that got married in hiking boots and wool sweaters, then went straight to the Adirondacks to go hiking so what the hell do we know! 🙂

  13. Oh, yeah. WE pay attention. And your wedding sounds lovely. Ours was in front of a very dear white haired lady at the Santa Ana Courthouse, who just lived to marry people. SO much so, that if you were having second thoughts, you went through it anyway, so as not to disappoint her. I always wanted the princess dress thing (kcruella as my matron of honor in puce colored silk, with festive pumpkins everywhere) , but I would have just spilled something down the front of it anyway.
    Maybe now’s the time, huh? Since it’s okay for wimmens of a ‘certain age’ and I know all about the miracle stain removing powers of Oxyclean? I feel a guest list coming on.

  14. How special are we to have a Fashion Correspondant from the U.K.?! The Swilling ~ we go to incredible lengths to stay cutting edge!(You rock, Mike {8^P !) And I would be very, very appreciative if our 3rd-time-around brides here would read your article.
    (Hmmm, I do like that sassy little scarlet number…)

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