Another Sign the Apocalypse Is Nigh

Cindy Adams is channeling me.

SO many celebs lining up to help Africa – Angelina, Bon Jovi, Madonna, Jay-Z, Clooney – there’ll soon be no room for animals. Next up, Lindsay Lohan, who just said: “Africa seems so exotic. I have always wanted to go there.” Great. Admirable. But how about helping Americans? Like in Appalachia or New Orleans?

5 Responses to “Another Sign the Apocalypse Is Nigh”

  1. Lisa says:

    New Orleans is, like, SO LAST YEAR, duh!

  2. “Been there, done that!”

  3. Firehand says:

    And Africa is so, third-world, y’know? SO much more correct than helping out here, y’know?

  4. Welcome, Firehand! And yup ~ nothing glamorous about coalminers’ kids or Kan-tuck-ee hill people, either. No one’s stakin’ out Buzzard Hollar in case they see Branjelina.

  5. Susanna says:

    Uh, yeah.
    I mean, what would be glam about an “I AM APPALACHIA” ad?
    Could you just see that smug Fishsticks Paltrow or that Amazon model Giselle, who look so gorgeous in the “I AM AFRICA” ads with the white (probably MAC) warpaint, in a rehashed “I AM APPALACHIA” ad with tar, black lung and no teeth?
    Mr. Bingley, can you get on your Photoshop, stat?

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