Gin Futures Plummeting…

If this turns out to be true

CAPE TOWN (2012-08-28): The University of Cape Town’s Science Department believes that it has found a single dose cure for Malaria. This was announced by researchers that have been working on this compound, from the aminopyridine class, for several years. Unlike conventional multidrug malaria treatments that the malaria parasite has become resistant to, Professor Kelly Chibale and his colleagues now believe that they have discovered a drug that over 18 months of trials ”killed these resistant parasites instantly”.

8 Responses to “Gin Futures Plummeting…”

  1. JeffS says:

    Isn’t gin a preventative for malaria?

    As in, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure”?

  2. leelu says:

    Mr B,

    The anti-malarial is the quinine in the tonic, not the gin itself. Gin futures will remain steady, tonic futures may fall, and, as always, you can mix with anything else. Me, I prefer grapefruit juice, but can’t anymore – the sticker on my Liptior-like meds say “No grapefruit juice. Ever.” (Very sad for me.)

    None the less, we should hoist a gin and tonic to celebrate the good news about the cure!

  3. aelfheld says:

    Tonic may need a tonic also.

  4. Mr. Bingley says:

    Oh, I know that leelu but if I don’t need to consume quinine why oh why would I ever touch gin?

    Well, aside from meeting my martini quota, obviously.

  5. leelu says:

    Mr B…

    Did you ever read “The Monkey House” by Kurt Vonnegut? If you haven’t you’ll appreciate it. If you have, you’ll know why I love the phrase “swilling gin”.

  6. Kathy Kinsley says:

    HEY – Vodka and tonic ain’t bad either! Just ask the Vodka Pundit. Or me. I’m allergic to gin (or the juniper, actually – bathtub Gin is fine and dandy…). 😛

    @leelu (And Nancy needs to chill…).

  7. Skyler says:

    This will be the single greatest thing to happen in human history after refrigeration if true.

  8. leelu says:




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