I Sense a Disturbance in the Force

from sea

Several sheriff’s deputies in Polk County, Fla., are being credited with saving the life of a 45-year-old man who was attacked by an alligator early Wednesday and was being pulled deeper into a lake, according to a police report. Authorities said the Polk County Sheriff’s Office received multiple calls at about 3:30 a.m. Wednesday concerning screams for help coming from an area of Lake Parker County Park near the Moose Lodge on East Lake Parker Drive.

…to shining sea.

Whale attacks trainer during show at SeaWorld in San Diego
…”He was pulled down at least twice by the whale and then let go,” Luque said. “He did not have life-threatening injuries. He was conscious the whole time.”

They executed the alligator who chomped the crackhead (apparently Bingley-style, he was naked and high)(the chompee, not the gator), but Shamu’s a high dollar blubber butt and got away with it yet again.
What is causing nearly simultaneous, bi-coastal water creature attacks? First it was stingrays thousands of miles apart in synchronous poking and now tandem ‘pulling’? It’s not bears and it’s not lions and it’s not angry squirrels.
It’s things that swim


– “No worries, boy! I saw this on Animal Planet!”
Bingley and Claude investigate the large bubbles coming to the surface. ©TPI

I’d watch that shower drain a little more closely first thing in the morning and have something besides a bar of soap handy…
UPDATE : Holy CRAP!! We’re doomed!! Eagle eyed Swiller CJ just sent me these horrifying news reports!!

California sea lions attack humans
Tourists flock to Fisherman’s Wharf for the seafood and the stunning views of San Francisco Bay, but for many visitors, the real stars are the dozens of playful, whiskered sea lions that lounge by the water’s edge, gulping down fish.
Now a series of sea-lion attacks on people in recent months has led experts to warn that the animals are not as cute and cuddly as they appear.

As I asked him, what could cause this…El Niño?

4 Responses to “I Sense a Disturbance in the Force”

  1. Mr. Bingley says:

    We discovered that those large bubbles were eminating from major dad…

  2. csason says:

    I was watching the guy from SeaWorld last night on tv, the interviewer finally reached an empass on the
    *tough* questions about the incident, as soon as she
    asked what were the requirements for becoming a trainer, Mr. Killer whale promoter broke into a huge grin.
    I’d seen the grin before. On car salesmen, on insurance salesmen, on real estate folks..(my wife is a killer saleslady) and it really bothered me.
    I think any animal that proves it’s unpredictability like this should at least be retired, or used in another way.
    I wonder if the news would be the same if the fish
    had flipped this trainer up in the air, like a tarpon and a shad..and inhaled them, never to be seen again…sort of..
    I just wonder.

  3. csason says:

    I don’t buy it… That fish just lollygagged around
    that pool. On one hand the experts claim they are very intelligent, at least as smart a dog..then expect us to believe the whale didn’t know it was hurting the trainer. I say bullshit.
    I had a horse once that would wait till just the right time to shank somebody she didn’t like, or get even, etc. That was real.

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