Let Me Get This Straight…
Troubled youths suffering from Post-Modern Parking Ennui have decided that their therapy should consist of jumping between buildings 80′ high, and when their therapy fails to…take hold they are suing the city. Now, ignoring for a moment the awful typos and editing in the article (hey, I make tons of typos and editing errors, but I don’t get paid to publish stuff. Geesh, where the heck are their editors?) and work with me on the last line:
The family says that’s not good enough and that both garages need to take responsibility before a garage jumper loses his life.
Um, what about the garage jumper taking some responsibility and realizing that maybe, just maybe jumping between 2 buildings 80′ high might not be the best thing to do on a slow day?
I wonder if Andrea’s going to sneek over there and pull down a fence or two to get her homies their Darwin Awards…
They sound like candidates for The Darwin Awards. That’s about as much payment as they shoudl recieve!
Saw your note, Mr. Bingley and sorry it has taken me so long to comment in reply! I did a double take on your church…it looks like our chapel! It must be very pretty inside!
It is Sharon…now hopefully we’ll find a way to pay for the sprucing up we did!
I hear ya on that! Which reminds me, I need to get back on revamping our website…I am woefully behind on that!
best regards,
The Continuing Adventures of Koko the Lesbian Gorilla
You just can’t make this stuff up. Another lawsuit has been filed in the Continuing Adventures of Koko the Lesbian Gorilla. The first suit was filed last week: REDWOOD CITY — Two former employees of the Gorilla Foundation are suing…
…sigh…here’s yer sign…
Tasing or defenestration
When it comes to scumbag lawyers, I’m not particular. The upside of this story, though, is that parents will no longer ask the rhetorical question, “…and if Tim Bargfrede jumped off an 80′ parking structure, would you do it too?”…
The legal term to be mentioned here is “assumption of the risk.” Any attorney who didn’t sleep through first-year Torts should know better than to take this asinine case. I hope the defendants seek the maximum sanctions against the plaintiffs and their lawyers for filing frivolous claims, although I know they’re not quite as severe nor as often enforced in state court in Florida than, for example, the equivalent penalties under Rule 11 of the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure.
That judicial leniency notwithstanding, in Florida any payout for civil liability in excess of $100,000, even as a settlement rather than in satisfaction of a judgment, has to be authorized by the legislature through a claim bill. I could be mistaken, but in the three years I worked for the legislature, I think we MAYBE passed four or five of them, and most of those were then vetoed by Jeb.
Why did they jump the garages? Because they were there. Ergo, it’s the city’s fault. And why not? The city’s got deep pockets.
What’s that? They’re really just our pockets? OK, shallow pockets – but MILLIONS of them. Huzzah!
To protect their/our pockets, the city is likely to start putting up fences, maybe with razor wire, to prevent jumping. They have elaborate (and pointy!) brackets in Florida to keep kids from walking across canals on water mains and stuff.
In Florida we consider the activities of these so-called “garage jumpers” to be part of God’s herd-thinning program.
My question is do they have to jump back to get their cars out of the lot they just left?