More of: Life With ths
If anyone was startled by the sound of a man howling something in the middle of the street last night, I apologize.
It was my husband.
The neighbors had moved out, and left their ghastly birdbath – which I had LONG coveted – ON. THE. CURB.
I saw it sitting there, in pieces, forlornly gracing the side of the road just a smidge after 9 as we were walking Maggie.
“Puta madre! I MUST HAVE IT!“
major dad. 
“Oh, HELL, no.”
On the way back, I snatched up the top piece – a lifelike sculptural representation of two doves, cooing lovingly at each other (Kinda like me and him, no? Okay, no.), and hoofed it home, ALL THE WHILE listening to “WE’RE NOT TAKING THAT.”
I was prepared to go it alone, as always.
“I’ll get the dolly. Never you mind.”
So, well, he gets the car (
), we pop down the street, and hoist the remaining two (what seem like 70 lbs a piece
) sections into the trunk. And, before closing said lid, he throws his arms to the sky and wails.
“I MARRIED FRED SANDFORD!!!!“
Like I said, sorry.
Man. That birdbath is SO ugly, it’s bitchin’. #score
UPDATE: Since certain people in the comments can’t leave well enough alone…
Fun | tree hugging sister | 
March 4, 2021 5:21 pm
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Pictures.
We need pictures.
Pictures.
We need pictures
Seconded!
Uh, Thirded!
You two are PRETTY BRAVE right before a weekend…
Have to agree with leelu & Gunslinger.
This AIN’T no “democracy”…
Oh, very well. I will offer…a tease.
“Thank you, sis!”