Tasty, Juicy, Delicious Pompous Irony!

What else? I must be talking about celebrities! Yes, Dear Readers, that concerned intellectual Oprah, who for years has been tearfully touting “A Green Truth and preaching to us about how bad we all are and how we are destroying the Gaia Spiritual Mother with our evil Bushy McHitlerstein consumerism…well, that’s all so 2008 and Hope and Changey, now ain’t it? Those days are gone, sucka, ‘cos now the Queen of Wrapping You In Her Balloony Bosomy Embrace is flying her entire studio audience to Australia

Oprah Winfrey kicked off her farewell Season in true Oprah fashion by surprising her audience with a big gift: She will be taking all 300 audience members on a trip down under to Australia.

“We’re…going…to…AUSTRALIA!!!!” Oprah announced to a shrieking crowd as confetti fell and her set was transformed into a mini airport, complete with a plane and worker with glow sticks to guide it on to the set.

…”Let’s say hello again to captain (John) Travolta,” Oprah said, as she introduced the celebrity pilot of their trip. Travolta is a licensed Quantas Airline pilot and has been helping Oprah plan the trip for over a year.

But I’m sure she’ll drive around Chicago in a Prius to offset the trip.

Global Environmental Crises are for the Little People.

9 Responses to “Tasty, Juicy, Delicious Pompous Irony!”

  1. Ave says:

    Her next announcement might be about tree-planting.

  2. major dad says:

    Wait till they try to get passports in a timely manner, ain’t gonna happen.

  3. ricki says:

    Oh, I’m sure Oprah will pull the appropriate strings and grease the appropriate palms, and every one of her “guests” will get a passport, even if that means Joe Schmoe who’s trying to get one to visit a dying relative in Germany gets pushed to the back of the line.

  4. Mr. Bingley says:

    Oh ricki that is so cynical and hateful.

    And 100% accurate, of course.

  5. Yojimbo says:

    Couldn’t they just like, you know, video conference this. I’m sure that shrimp on the barbie would look muy bueno in HD. They could turn the a/c off in the studio for that authentic feeling while helping Mother Gaia.

    Yeah, the probability of a passport delay is zero, zippo and nada. One afternoon turnaround sounds about right. Welcome to the “Heck Yes, and Now!” fly list.

  6. Twenty five years of this shit…. Garg….

  7. Dave E. says:

    Oprah and her Green Truth friends make more tools than Sears these days.

  8. Dr Alice says:

    Look at it this way.
    First prize: one week in Australia with Oprah.
    Second prize: TWO weeks in Australia… with Oprah.

  9. JeffS says:

    Maybe we can get the Aussies to land her in Antarctica? I suspect she would thrive on roast penguin.

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