When major dad and the Real JeffS Get Done Yakkin’

…they’ll wish everyone the happiest of New Year’s, too!!

Bush Creates Rampaging Army Of Zombie Glaciers

I thought all these damned glaciers were supposed to be gone by now

INDIANAPOLIS — An Antarctic cruise turned scary for former Indiana Gov. Joe Kernan when a Norwegian cruise ship on which he and his wife were passengers lost engine power during an electrical outage and struck a glacier.
The ship was carrying some 300 people. No injuries were reported.
The MS Fram hit the ice near Browns Bluff in the Antarctic, where it had stopped to view a penguin colony, Kernan said.
“Most folks could see the glacier approaching as the boat made contact with it,” Kernan told The Associated Press in a phone interview from the ship Sunday. He said that the experience was scary “because you just don’t know what’s going to happen.”

This just keeps getting worserer and worserer! Not only has Chimpy McHitlerstein created marauding gangs of jellyfish; now he’s created zombie glaciers that attack boats carrying Democrat ex-Governors!
Is there any eevul he won’t do?

Happy New Year!

Just a quick note to wish all of you a safe and happy New Year.
And my profoundest thanks for your readership and comments.

Amazing Incompetence In Pakistan

This frankly stuns me. One of the country’s leaders is assassinated…and the doctors don’t perform an autopsy?

New Delhi: Mystery shrouds the death of former Pakistan prime minister Benazir Bhutto. In an explosive revelation, Pakistan’s Interior Minister Hamid Nawaz on Friday said that Bhutto did not die of bullet wounds.
Nawaz said that Bhutto died from a head injury. At least seven doctors from the Rawalpindi General Hospital – where the leader was rushed immediately after the attack – say there were no bullet marks on Bhutto’s body.
The doctors have submitted a report to the Pakistan government in which they say that no post-mortem was performed on Bhutto’s body and they had not received any instructions to perform one.
“The report says she had head injuries – an irregular patch – and the X-ray doesn’t show any bullet in the head. So it was probably the shrapnel or any other thing has struck her in her said. That damaged her brain, causing it to ooze and her death. The report categorically ssyas there’s no wound other than that,” Nawaz told a Pakistani news channel.

Are you kidding me? “Gee, no one told us to do an autopsy”? How could this possibly happen, given the huge political ramifications of her murder? How will the government possibly defend itself against the conspiracy theories that this will spawn is beyond me.
Is there some RoP prohibition against cutting open dead bodies? Mind you, that would be odd since there seems to be no such prohibition against blowing living bodies into little bits.

Beyond Parody

“Mommy, Niko is on my side of the seat”

Seven people were injured on Thursday when Greek Orthodox and Armenian priests came to blows in a dispute over how to clean the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem.
Following the Christmas celebrations, Greek Orthodox priests set up ladders to clean the walls and ceilings of their part of the church, which is built over the site where Jesus Christ is believed to have been born.
But the ladders encroached on space controlled by Armenian priests, according to photographers who said angry words ensued and blows quickly followed.
For a quarter of an hour bearded and robed priests laid into each other with fists, brooms and iron rods while the photographers who had come to take pictures of the annual cleaning ceremony recorded the whole event.

I mean, I know that Christmas can be stressful and all that, but geesh louise guys…
Update: I see the Spider was onto this yesterday.

Oh Shit, This Is Not Good In Pakistan

Benazir Bhutto has been killed.
Update: Maybe only critically injured. What a mess this will be.
Update: Other sources say dead.

I Still Hate Spammers

Getting pounded again.

The Pain Is Still Too Fresh

To my dying day I will remember the teaser from Frank Reynolds on ABC’s World News Tonight before a commercial break: David 77, Goliath 72.
And there was no Christmas joy for me that year.
Thank you, Sports Illustrated, for twisting the knife in yet again.

“Tell Ya’ ‘Bout Them Sobbin’ Women…”

Who lived in Roman days..

How can you not love a song that mentions Plutarch?
I am so watching this movie tonight.
Absolutely love it.

“A Man Can’t Sleep…”

…When he sleeps with sheep.”

Truer words were never spoken.

Michael Kidd Has Died

“Who is that?” You ask? The man who choreographed one of my favorite movies of all time, Seven Brides For Seven Brothers

A brilliant man.
RIP

Dear Mr. Lileks ~ I Have a Christmas Pixie

…in the fridge as well…

…but it’s bleeding, not bleating.

“Ring On Meat Key”

As if it’d be anything else.

Watch

…and weep. Stick around for the second video.

I love a good Christmas story.

Putin On The Ritz

I’m shocked, shocked that there is corruption in politics! Oh, Mr. President, here are your winnings

An unprecedented battle is taking place inside the Kremlin in advance of Vladimir Putin’s departure from office, the Guardian has learned, with claims that the president presides over a secret multibillion-dollar fortune.
Rival clans inside the Kremlin are embroiled in a struggle for the control of assets as Putin prepares to transfer power to his hand-picked successor, Dmitry Medvedev, in May, well-placed political observers and other sources have revealed.
At stake are billions of dollars in assets belonging to Russian state-run corporations. Additionally, details of Putin’s own personal fortune, reportedly hidden in Switzerland and Liechtenstein, are being discussed for the first time.
…Citing sources inside the president’s administration, Belkovsky claims that after eight years in power Putin has secretly accumulated more than $40bn (£20bn). The sum would make him Russia’s – and Europe’s – richest man.
In an interview with the Guardian, Belkovsky repeated his claims that Putin owns vast holdings in three Russian oil and gas companies, concealed behind a “non-transparent network of offshore trusts”.
Putin “effectively” controls 37% of the shares of Surgutneftegaz, an oil exploration company and Russia’s third biggest oil producer, worth $20bn, he says. He also owns 4.5% of Gazprom, and “at least 75%” of Gunvor, a mysterious Swiss-based oil trader, founded by Gennady Timchenko, a friend of the president’s, Belkovsky alleges.

I wonder if he used Hillary’s cattle trader?

A Sad Note

Now there are only two left

NORTH BALTIMORE, Ohio (AP) — One of only three known remaining American World War I veterans has died.
The Smith-Crates Funeral Home in North Baltimore, Ohio says J. Russell Coffey died yesterday at the age of 109. He had been living in a nursing home. There’s no word on the cause of death.
The Veterans Affairs Department says Coffey was the last World War I vet in Ohio. Coffey enlisted in the Army in October 1918 while a student at Ohio State University.
It was a month before the Allied powers and Germany signed a cease-fire agreement and Coffey did not see action overseas. He did play semipro baseball and earned a doctorate in education from New York University.
Coffey taught high school and college and raised a family. According to the funeral home, he drove his car until he was 104 and lived on his own until three years ago.

What changes the world went through in his life time.

UNC Chapel Hill

Where women are men and men are nervous

Women Charged With Sexually Assaulting UNC Football Players
Hillsborough — Three UNC football players were the victims in a kidnapping, robbery and sexual assault incident involving two women, the university confirmed Thursday afternoon.
Chapel Hill police said the assault happened about 3:30 a.m. Sunday at an apartment complex where all three victims were bound with tape and then assaulted by the suspects.
At a bond hearing Thursday, Orange County Assistant District Attorney Morgan Whitney said police arrived at the scene and found two of the victims, tied up, in boxer shorts. The third victim was fully clothed with his hands tied.
At least two were sexually assaulted, Whitney said. He is still waiting on the final police report to see if the third man was also. None of the victims required medical attention.

I mean, I know the Chapel Hill crowd is always trying to one-up the Dukies, but this is a little ridiculous even by ACC standards.

R. Lee Ermy ~ Still Wearin’ Green

…and whipping Santa’s slackers into fightin’ trim. (Not for tender ears. In any way, shape or form.)

As It SHOULD Be

…and so seldom never seems to.

Bear Stearns (BSC, news, msgs) has reported its first quarterly loss in the company’s history.
The financial-services company this morning reported a loss of $854 million, or $6.90 per share in its fiscal fourth quarter. The company had earned $563 million, or $4 per share, in profit in the same quarter last year. Analysts had been looking for a loss of $1.67 per share.
…”We are obviously upset with our 2007 results,” Chief Executive Jimmy Cayne said in a press release. “When Bear Stearns became a public company . . . we designed our executive compensation programs to pay for performance. In a year in which we produced unacceptable results, the plans are working as they were designed — and the members of the executive committee will not receive any bonuses for 2007.”

And that’s gotta hurt…

Last year, Cayne got a base salary of just $250,000;his 2006 bonus, on the other hand,

added up to $33.6 million.

A Nun Walks Into The Mother Superior’s Office…

and plunks down into a chair.
She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration.
What troubles you, Sister?” asks the Mother Superior. “I thought this was the day you spent with your family.”
“It was,” sighed the Sister. “And I went to play golf with my brother. We try to play golf as often as we can. You know I was quite a talented golfer before I devoted my life to Christ.”
“I seem to recall that,” the Mother Superior agreed. “So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?”
“Far from it,” snorted the Sister. “In fact, I even took the Lord’s name in vain today!”
“Goodness, Sister!” gasped the Mother Superior, astonished. “You must tell me all about it!”
“Well, we were on the fifth tee…and this hole is a monster, Mother – 540 yard Par 5, with a nasty dogleg left and a hidden green…and I hit the drive of my life. I creamed it. The sweetest swing I ever made. And it’s flying straight and true, right along the line I wanted..and it hits a bird in mid-flight not 100 yards off the tee!”
“Oh my!” commiserated the Mother. “How unfortunate! But surely that didn’t make you blaspheme, Sister!”
“No, that wasn’t it,” admitted Sister. “While I was still trying to fathom what had happened, this squirrel runs out of the woods grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway!”
“Oh, that would have made me blaspheme!” sympathized Mother.
“But I didn’t, Mother Superior!” sobbed the Sister. “And I was so proud of myself! And while I was pondering whether this was a sign from G-d, this hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the squirrel and flies off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!”
“So that’s when you cursed,” said the Mother with a knowing smile.
“Nope, that wasn’t it either,” cried the Sister, anguished, “because as the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started struggling, and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and the ball popped out of his paws and rolled to about 18 inches from the cup!”
Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest, fixed the Sister with a baleful stare and said…

Read more »

I Have To Say, As A Platform This Works For Me

Simple and to the point

Now if only Teh Fred would actually come out and say it…

A Special Night

Tonight marks the 20th anniversary of my first date with my Bride.
And to mark the occasion I got her a special gift…

Read more »

Well Here’s Good News For The UK

Guess what the Second Most Popular Teddy Bear Boy’s Name was in Britain this year?

For the last 13 years it has reigned supreme as the most popular boy’s name in the land.
But in multicultural Britain, children named after the Muslim prophet Mohammed could soon be outnumbering the long-time favourite Jack.
In a reflection of the increasing influence of Islam on UK society, figures released by the Office of National Statistics yesterday showed that the most popular spelling of the name – Mohammed – had climbed five places to 17th in the annual list of most popular baby names.
But when the seven other spellings of the name are taken into account, the total amounted to 6,347 babies, making it the second-most popular name of the year – up from 5,936 last year.

Not a very rosy outlook for Merry Olde Englande, I’m afraid. Here’s a peek at Britain’s “Pub of the Future”…

Well, This Is Disappointing

She seemed to me to be a sensible kid

NEW YORK (AP) — Another Spears baby is reportedly on the way — and it’s not Britney’s.
Jamie Lynn Spears, the 16-year-old “Zoey 101” star and sister of Britney, told OK! magazine that she’s pregnant and that the father is her boyfriend, Casey Aldridge.
“It was a shock for both of us, so unexpected,” she said. “I was in complete and total shock and so was he.”

What, did you skip your health classes on “Zoey 101”? How much of a “shock” can this be? “So unexpected”?
What a great spokesman for Nickelodeon.

Tell-Tale Signs of Exhaust

…fumes.

…Now since the Democrats insisted on keeping the tax increase in the bill, it meant that they were going to have to get 60 votes to invoke cloture before they could try and pass it. Then the bill would be sent to a certain death by presidential veto. It was a doomed bill, and a clear waste of everybody’s time. In other words, Thursday was just a typical day in the Senate under Democratic leadership, 2007. How did the vote go? 59-40-1, one shy of invoking cloture and clearing the hurdle to full passage in the Senate.
Remember the Democrats on stage in Iowa mid-day Thursday? Four of them are current United States Senators: Barack Obama, Hillary ‘Hand-raiser’ Clinton, Joe Biden and Christopher Dodd. They were all called back to Washington Thursday morning to cast this energy vote, and then they all bailed out immediately after the Senate session to return to the debate stage in Iowa. Anyone out there able to calculate the energy expended from four round-trip airplane rides to D.C. and back for a failed vote on a polluted energy bill? What about the carbon footprint left by the Democrats Thursday alone, and the irony of Hillary Clinton trying to get the ridiculous debate moderator to do a hand-raising of the candidates on who believes in global warming and mankind’s impact on it?

They stink to the high heavens and give you a headache to boot.

A Swill Salute to Duane for spotting the contrails.

Since THIS is REAL “But Alderan is Peaceful, We Have No Pants!” Stuff

For the first time astronomers have witnessed a supermassive black hole blasting its galactic neighbor with a deadly beam of energy.
The “death star galaxy,” as NASA astronomers called it, could obliterate the atmospheres of planets but also trigger the birth of stars in its wake of its destructive beam. Fortunately, the cosmic violence is a safe distance from our own neck of the cosmos.

This composite image shows the jet from a black hole at the center of a galaxy, at left, striking the edge of another galaxy. The image combines X-ray emissions seen by the Chandra X-Ray Observatory (purple), optical and ultraviolet data from the Hubble Space Telescope (red and orange) and radio emissions from the Very Large Array and the MERLIN array (blue).

…maybe letting Hubble go blind would be a bad idea.