Mike Hill WON the Fl House District 2 Special Election Last Night!!! Woot! Woot!

A well deserved, hard fought, yet GENTLEMANLY victory. We Republican Redneck Riviera bitter clingers and racist H8rs can REJOICE in our TRIUMPH!!

I’ve waited four long years to see this day ~ since the first time I met Mike outside a gunshow, each of us working our respective cause in the blazing Florida heat. He was dipping his fledgling political toes in a race against Greg Evers, and I was running Rubio’s infant campaign for the county. We bonded immediately, and I saw the great integrity and promise in this most impressive of individuals. Plus, he’s JUST a great guy.

Oh. It was a lovely party to be at.

Mike Hill runs away with state House District 2 election
Democrat Jeremy Lau refuses to concede race despite the lopsided results

Mike Hill, a former Air Force captain and founder of the Northwest Florida Tea Party, soundly defeated his Democratic opponent in the special state House District 2 race Tuesday, becoming the first black legislator to represent the region since Reconstruction.

But Hill, surrounded by throngs of supporters at New World Landing on Palafox Place, said he’s more concerned about delivering the staunchly conservative governance he promised voters than the history-making implications of his victory.

“I want them to remember me as a representative who truly served the people and did it with conservative values,” he said.

The color doesn’t matter. What matters most is that person’s character, what they’re committed to and what they have the courage to stand for.

Gawd, Somebody Else Who Has Jumped The Shark

Oh, wait, sorry: the shark jumped them

Two fishermen from New Jersey had an exciting fishing trip off the New Jersey coast: a mako shark jumped into their boat and began chewing things on the deck.

I think we need a bigger boat…

Goodbye America

You had a good run while it lasted.

Schumer said the Gang of Eight would not compromise by conditioning the path to citizenship on “factors that may not ever happen” like border security. He complained that border security should not be used as a “bargaining chip.”

And while Schumer claims the bill fixes enforcement issues, he also dismissed border security as not a pressing concern.

Disgusting. I don’t know what else to say.

Your Twitter “LOLZ” of the Day

I know. Hilarious.

Global Warming Is For Realz

My God, it’s even now affecting the Sun

Tornadoes are a known natural cause of destruction here on Earth, but who knew they were also hitting other areas of our solar system? A recent video released from the NASA’s Solar Dynamic Observatory (SDO) shows a sped up version of a 38-hour tornado experience on the sun.

Throughout the one-minute clip, multiple tornadoes can be seen making contact. According to Space.com’s YouTube page, the footage captured June 3 shows plasma moving across the sun’s surface, which is also commonly referred to as “sun tornadoes.”

NOW will all you Deniers come to your senses?

Good to Know He’s Not After EVERYbody

Just some of “them”.

“We don’t think government can do everything,” he said. “We don’t think that top-down solutions are the right way to go. We believe in the free market. We believe in a light touch when it comes to regulations.”

We don’t want to tax all businesses out of business,” Obama said.

“But we do think that there’s a role to play for government.”

To Get A Good Grade In Alchemy

Harry Potter has to know his Elements

(mentioning “New Math” in the previous post made me think of course of Tom Lehrer…)

Here’s Today’s “New Math” Lesson In Spanish

Ochocinco es igual a treinta

Former NFL wide receiver Chad Johnson has been sentenced to 30 days in a Fort Lauderdale jail for violating his probation in a domestic abuse case against his ex-wife and reality TV personality Evelyn Lozada. A plea deal had been reached on Monday but fell apart after Johnson playfully slapped his attorney on the behind.

Broward Judge Kathleen McHugh said Johnson wasn’t taking the case seriously enough even after Johnson apologized for the playful slap on his attorney. Judge McHugh also extended Johnson’s probation by three months.

The 35-year-old Johnson, formerly known as Chad Ochocinco, pleaded no-contest to allegedly head-butting Lozada during an argument in August. Lozada, who appears on the reality TV show Basketball Wives, filed for divorce just a month after marriage. Johnson was then released by the Miami Dolphins following his arrest.

Proof We Have The Bestest Readers In The World!

Just look at the lovely coaster one Dear Reader sent me along with a lovely note composed of the following kind words:

“Why did this make me think of you?”

coastermio

(please note the mostly-empty gin and tonic in the background is provided solely for scale)

Tebow to the Patriots

LOVE it.

And Rex Ryan is still pond scum.

ths adds: This sentiment is also true:

Remember, Only Cops And Bloomberg’s Bodyguards…

…can be trusted with guns

Apparent road rage incident leads to fatal shooting in Anne Arundel County

By Martin Weil and Maggie Fazeli Fard, Published: June 9 E-mail the writers

A police officer from New Jersey shot and killed a Maryland man after a reported road-rage incident on a highway in Anne Arundel County, the Maryland State Police said.

Perhaps the Worm is Truly Turning

Buried in this AP column about the country’s ‘loss of trust’ in the Obama Administration is a bald admission:

…Even Democrats are warning that more angst may be ahead as the government steps up its efforts to implement Obama’s extraordinarily expensive, deeply unpopular health care law.

First, they call it “extraordinarily expensive”. REALLY? We’ve been telling YOU that. BUT. Nowhere before have I EVER heard them come right out and say “NO one wants it”. They’ve always tried to caveat it with GOP this, conservative that, Tea Party angst whatever ~ never a flat, honest acknowledgement that the worthless disaster is, indeed, “DEEPLY UNPOPULAR”.

Steyn Gets It Exactly Right

In this short post over at NRO he to my mind sums up exactly where we are

Because the formal, visible state has been neutered by political correctness, the dark, furtive shadow state has to expand massively to make, in secret, the judgment calls that can no longer be made in public. That’s not an arrangement that is likely to end well.

I know there are many on the right who feel that this massive data mining is necessary to ‘prevent another 9/11’. I most emphatically disagree. There is no such thing as absolute safety, there are no guarantees, and this is a very slippery slope into totalitarian life. This is not the realm of paranoid fantasy, as the news revelations should make rather clear to any sentient being. Everyday in our own lives we see people around us, hell we see us in various ways to varying degrees who are corrupted by the little tendrils of power that pass through our fingers. A furtive glance at scribbles on a co-worker’s desk. A peek at someone’s record at the DMV. A gentle (or not so gentle depending upon what we think we can get away with) snub of someone who for some reason annoys us. Regardless of the philosophical framework you want to couch it in we are all fallen and prone to corruption and moral decay. Yet we are told that people just as inherently weak as we are but who are, in essence, nameless, faceless and thereby effectively unaccountable who are offered this unimaginably rich trove of every juicy and salacious detail of everyone’s lives will not somehow not fall prey to the natural incessant urge to gossip, mine and abuse their position and this information? And they say this even after we have not mere anecdotal evidence but actual, verified, concrete proof that across the full spectrum of the government, from the local town level to the state to every root and branch of the federal government that in fact power, all power not just ‘absolute’ power, does in fact corrupt absolutely, still there are those who say that gosh it’s tolerable because we need to protect ourselves from terrorists. There are and always will be terrorists. There always will be people who will do what they can to kill other people. A totalitarian state is no guarantee of personal safety; it is only a guarantee of personal subjugation.

‘With Obama We Actually Have a Brother Watching Us’

That’s okay ~ The NSA has all Leno’s stuff before HE does.

Unemployment Moves Up to 7.6%

This Pethokoukis tweet blows the Democratic talking points of “Imagine how low unemployment’d be without the #GOPSequester !” (And, yes, they think there are still Americans out there with throats not too sore willing to swallow THAT one.) (Wait. The NewsHour DID have Krugman on last night, so I guess they have a hard core Zombie audience…)

With All This News Coming Out About Our Government

I just felt the need to read this again.

Be seated.

Men, all this stuff you hear about America not wanting to fight, wanting to stay out of the war, is a lot of bullshit. Americans love to fight. All real Americans love the sting and clash of battle. When you were kids, you all admired the champion marble shooter, the fastest runner, the big-league ball players and the toughest boxers. Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Americans play to win all the time. That’s why Americans have never lost and will never lose a war. The very thought of losing is hateful to Americans. Battle is the most significant competitions in which a man can indulge. It brings out all that is best and it removes all that is base.

You are not all going to die. Only two percent of you right here today would be killed in a major battle. Every man is scared in his first action. If he says he’s not, he’s a goddamn liar. But the real hero is the man who fights even though he’s scared. Some men will get over their fright in a minute under fire, some take an hour, and for some it takes days. But the real man never lets his fear of death overpower his honor, his sense of duty to his country, and his innate manhood.

All through your army career you men have bitched about what you call ‘this chicken-shit drilling.’ That is all for a purpose—to ensure instant obedience to orders and to create constant alertness. This must be bred into every soldier. I don’t give a f*** for a man who is not always on his toes. But the drilling has made veterans of all you men. You are ready! A man has to be alert all the time if he expects to keep on breathing. If not, some German son-of-a-bitch will sneak up behind him and beat him to death with a sock full of shit. There are four hundred neatly marked graves in Sicily, all because one man went to sleep on the job—but they are German graves, because we caught the bastard asleep before his officer did.

An army is a team. It lives, eats, sleeps, and fights as a team. This individual hero stuff is bullshit. The bilious bastards who write that stuff for the Saturday Evening Post don’t know any more about real battle than they do about f***ing. And we have the best team—we have the finest food and equipment, the best spirit and the best men in the world. Why, by God, I actually pity these poor bastards we’re going up against.

All the real heroes are not storybook combat fighters. Every single man in the army plays a vital role. So don’t ever let up. Don’t ever think that your job is unimportant. What if every truck driver decided that he didn’t like the whine of the shells and turned yellow and jumped headlong into a ditch? That cowardly bastard could say to himself, ‘Hell, they won’t miss me, just one man in thousands.’ What if every man said that? Where in the hell would we be then? No, thank God, Americans don’t say that. Every man does his job. Every man is important. The ordnance men are needed to supply the guns, the quartermaster is needed to bring up the food and clothes for us because where we are going there isn’t a hell of a lot to steal. Every last damn man in the mess hall, even the one who boils the water to keep us from getting the GI shits, has a job to do.

Each man must think not only of himself, but think of his buddy fighting alongside him. We don’t want yellow cowards in the army. They should be killed off like flies. If not, they will go back home after the war, goddamn cowards, and breed more cowards. The brave men will breed more brave men. Kill off the goddamn cowards and we’ll have a nation of brave men.

One of the bravest men I saw in the African campaign was on a telegraph pole in the midst of furious fire while we were moving toward Tunis. I stopped and asked him what the hell he was doing up there. He answered, ‘Fixing the wire, sir.’ ‘Isn’t it a little unhealthy up there right now?’ I asked. ‘Yes sir, but this goddamn wire has got to be fixed.’ I asked, ‘Don’t those planes strafing the road bother you?’ And he answered, ‘No sir, but you sure as hell do.’ Now, there was a real soldier. A real man. A man who devoted all he had to his duty, no matter how great the odds, no matter how seemingly insignificant his duty appeared at the time.

And you should have seen the trucks on the road to Gabès. Those drivers were magnificent. All day and all night they crawled along those son-of-a-bitch roads, never stopping, never deviating from their course with shells bursting all around them. Many of the men drove over 40 consecutive hours. We got through on good old American guts. These were not combat men. But they were soldiers with a job to do. They were part of a team. Without them the fight would have been lost.

Sure, we all want to go home. We want to get this war over with. But you can’t win a war lying down. The quickest way to get it over with is to get the bastards who started it. We want to get the hell over there and clean the goddamn thing up, and then get at those purple-pissing Japs. The quicker they are whipped, the quicker we go home. The shortest way home is through Berlin and Tokyo. So keep moving. And when we get to Berlin, I am personally going to shoot that paper-hanging son-of-a-bitch Hitler.

When a man is lying in a shell hole, if he just stays there all day, a Boche will get him eventually. The hell with that. My men don’t dig foxholes. Foxholes only slow up an offensive. Keep moving. We’ll win this war, but we’ll win it only by fighting and showing the Germans that we’ve got more guts than they have or ever will have. We’re not just going to shoot the bastards, we’re going to rip out their living goddamned guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks. We’re going to murder those lousy Hun c***suckers by the bushel-f***ing-basket.

Some of you men are wondering whether or not you’ll chicken out under fire. Don’t worry about it. I can assure you that you’ll all do your duty. War is a bloody business, a killing business. The Nazis are the enemy. Wade into them, spill their blood or they will spill yours. Shoot them in the guts. Rip open their belly. When shells are hitting all around you and you wipe the dirt from your face and you realize that it’s not dirt, it’s the blood and gut of what was once your best friend, you’ll know what to do.

I don’t want any messages saying ‘I’m holding my position.’ We’re not holding a goddamned thing. We’re advancing constantly and we’re not interested in holding anything except the enemy’s balls. We’re going to hold him by his balls and we’re going to kick him in the ass; twist his balls and kick the living shit out of him all the time. Our plan of operation is to advance and keep on advancing. We’re going to go through the enemy like shit through a tinhorn.

There will be some complaints that we’re pushing our people too hard. I don’t give a damn about such complaints. I believe that an ounce of sweat will save a gallon of blood. The harder we push, the more Germans we kill. The more Germans we kill, the fewer of our men will be killed. Pushing harder means fewer casualties. I want you all to remember that. My men don’t surrender. I don’t want to hear of any soldier under my command being captured unless he is hit. Even if you are hit, you can still fight. That’s not just bullshit either. I want men like the lieutenant in Libya who, with a Luger against his chest, swept aside the gun with his hand, jerked his helmet off with the other and busted the hell out of the Boche with the helmet. Then he picked up the gun and he killed another German. All this time the man had a bullet through his lung. That’s a man for you!

Don’t forget, you don’t know I’m here at all. No word of that fact is to be mentioned in any letters. The world is not supposed to know what the hell they did with me. I’m not supposed to be commanding this army. I’m not even supposed to be in England. Let the first bastards to find out be the goddamned Germans. Some day, I want them to rise up on their piss-soaked hind legs and howl ‘Ach! It’s the goddamned Third Army and that son-of-a-bitch Patton again!’

Then there’s one thing you men will be able to say when this war is over and you get back home. Thirty years from now when you’re sitting by your fireside with your grandson on your knee and he asks, ‘What did you do in the great World War Two?’ You won’t have to cough and say, ‘Well, your granddaddy shoveled shit in Louisiana.’ No sir, you can look him straight in the eye and say ‘Son, your granddaddy rode with the great Third Army and a son-of-a-goddamned-bitch named George Patton!

All right, you sons of bitches. You know how I feel. I’ll be proud to lead you wonderful guys in battle any time, anywhere. That’s all.

Is it even possible to read that and not hear it in George C. Scott’s voice in your head?

Yay

See ya!

ANDREA IS RAPIDLY LOSING TROPICAL CHARACTERISTICS. MOST OF THE RAIN
IS NOW DISPLACED TO THE NORTHWESTERN SEMICIRCLE…AND THERE IS AN
INTRUSION OF DRY AIR BETWEEN THE CENTER AND A CONVECTIVE BAND TO
THE EAST. BUOY AND RADAR DATA STILL SUPPORTS AN INITIAL INTENSITY
OF 40 KNOTS….BUT THESE WINDS ARE OCCURRING OVER WATER IN THE
EASTERN SEMICIRCLE. ANDREA IS ALREADY EMBEDDED IN THE MID-LATITUDE
WESTERLIES AND THE TRANSFORMATION PROCESS INTO A POST-
TROPICAL/EXTRATROPICAL CYCLONE IS FORECAST TO CONTINUE TODAY.

How Do You Spell “Boot Licking, Ball-less, Chicken Shit Sychophants”?

Why, it’s spelled New York Times, of course.

The New York Times Quietly Softened Its Scathing Obama Editorial

When the Paper of Record published a blistering editorial on President Obama’s overbearing national security precautions today, one line stood out from the dozens of others as being the most vicious:

The administration has now lost all credibility.

…The sentence now reads, “The administration has now lost all credibility on this issue,” which is quite a different statement altogether.

No mention of the corrective action appending the editorial, either. Just magic wand action.

Momentary flash of honest brilliance squelched ~ snubbed and snuffed out like a smudgey candle.

Whacha wanna bet “Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked.”?

God I Hope This Guy Boots Lindsey Graham Butt

Everything He Says Has An Expiration Date

Every

Single

Call.

Just remember, you’re just being paranoid, you h8tr.

Esther Williams Has Died

Send in the nuns!

I Got a Real Chortle Out of The Fishwrap Headline This Morning

Governor urges UWF’s Bense to keep tuition rates flat

Because yesterday morning, I was standing next to my favorite gov when that university president walked in to the Aviation Center, looking every inch the stern academic. He leaned back towards me (which is QUITE a lean from his height, mind you) whispering, “That’s Dr. Judy Bense, UWF’s president.” He made the flat out/cancelling hand gesture. “NO more tuition hikes,” he said with a little smile. Wistfully.

Without thinking, I shot back, “Let me know if you need me to throw my body between you two. I can do it.

He was still laughing when she and her companion got to us for introductions. I hope I helped.

I could take her AND the guy she drove in with.

D-Day

Honor their sacrifice by upholding their ideals.

Once Again Iran Continues To Rise To Parody

with sadly very real results.

Old School

Name the game:

oldschool2

oldschool

I had the old SE (bought by my Bride in 1988) out and running the other night. These games, and this one especially, are still a lot of fun.

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