Christmas Turducken!

Well, as promised, the much-anticipated turducken was prepared for the Christmas Day dinner! I’ve waited until now to post this, as I wanted to make sure that everyone got out of the hospital.

Well, I’m dressed and ready! Let’s go…

Firstly, the beasty had been thawing in the back fridge for 5 days, right above the twice-baked potatos and keylime pie that I also slaved over:

Now it’s out on the counter for you, you spineless beast!

Onto the rack…

And tented in the oven for 3 hours.

Not very exciting, really. Thank God I had a lot of wine and dear reader/de facto family member KCruella over to keep us company! She arrived shortly before the Turd came out of the oven to be de-tented…

WTF is that stuff oozing out? That’s three different types of avian blood burbling up through the Frankensteinian sutures holding this unholy creation together, like some sort of Beverly Hillbilly/Marilyn Manson/Emeril nightmarish melange…thank goodness I was the only one in the kitchen at this point, or they would have been dialing Dominos.
Anyhow, back in the oven for another hour, spawn of Satan!
Man, the house is starting to smell great. Is this damn thing done yet?

170º! Yes! Now sit for 30 minutes while I heat up the twice-baked…

You can sort of see the stitching as it’s on the platter.

Then you pull the thread out, slice it lengthwise down the center along the thread line, and cut the slices from that half…

The pride of any table!

But how did it taste, you ask? Well, interesting is the first thing that comes to mind. Overall, the cajun spices were fairly strong; I liked that, mind you, but I’m not so sure about everyone else. It was stuffed with a cornbread/pork stuffing that was divine, really. The turkey and the chicken were done, if I may say so, to perfection: still moist and full of flavor. The duck portion of it had a funny texture. Oh, it was definitely cooked, but the texture was more like…pork, I guess, then what I would expect duck to be.
I’m not sure it will reappear at Christmas, but I will certainly have another one at some point.

13 Responses to “Christmas Turducken!”

  1. Emily says:

    Dude, that is like the gayest apron EVER.

  2. I bought him that, Emily.
    20 years ago.

    Love to eat them Mousies,
    Mousies what I loves to eat.
    Bite they little heads off,
    Nibble on they tiny feet.

    Sex, mice and rock ‘n roll. You’d LOVE his stuff.
    (Kliban’s, that is.)

  3. Donnah says:

    Actually, the concept of turducken is pretty gay too.
    Pretty table.

  4. Susanna says:

    The Kliban cats RULE. We have that apron at my parents’ house! And coffee mugs, etc. A nice one is the cat eating sushi (a mouse laid over a gob of rice).
    The turd is sort of causing me to retch a little. The cross-section photos frighten me. And I have a ginormous caribou head on my wall.

  5. Never eat anything bigger than your head.
    One of my favorite books. And damn good advice as well.
    Hence, no ugly a$$ turducken at Casa de Major Dad.

  6. Lisa says:

    I’ve always wondered what sort of person served a turducken.
    And now I know.
    (Nice advertising of the Sod Off Swampy mug, there!)

  7. WunderKraut says:

    I guess I am the only one here who had to Google “turducken” to find out what the hell was in that bag. I was scared until I found out what it was…..interesting…

  8. major dad says:

    Umm, that looks like a, I can’t say…Bing, stick to prime rib or rack of lamb. We had one for my office party in Nov.; it looked the same and the duck portion was well, weird. I salute your bravery. Let’s talk about drinking again.

  9. Kcruella says:

    The turducken was wonderful as was the key lime pie he slaved over. Little concerned about the apron, left it on well after dinner…

  10. Mr. Bingley says:

    It was my kilt substitute.

  11. Cindermutha says:

    It sounds… interesting. I’d try it once, maybe on Halloween. That would be a good time for Frankenbird.

  12. Mr. Bingley says:

    Oooh, I like that. Think of the fun we could have carving it…

  13. The_Real_JeffS says:

    I dunno, Mr. Bingley, I’m just glad that you liked it. Anything named Turducken sets off alarm bells in my head!!!

Image | WordPress Themes