Quiche Derange

Bacon Circus Peanut Key Lime Pie.

It began innocently enough.

But then, it always seems that way, doesn’t it? What could possibly be the harm you might think of Laura casually mentioning in a comment over at Aggie’s that she was

…going to hold out trying this one (a chocolate flavored wine) and wait for a Circus Peanut flavored wine. Oh, or bacon. Oooh, or a combo of the two. Mmmmmm.

and, well, the damage was done. The seed was sown. The grim was reaping.

Why did she have to say that? Why??

I’ll tell you why. She knew, in that corrupted Tyrannosaurus worshiping psyche of hers that I would not, nay could not resist the siren call that would draw me oh so close to wreckage on the treacherous rocks of culinary infamy.

She knew I would be forced to make this

The Pah of Death.

How did I arrive at this fateful place? It started with these

and the experience gleaned from my last foray into Better Living Through Circus Peanuts: the damned things don’t melt. So I decided in a boldly innovative way that I needed one of these

Say hello to the Blender.

Powdery Pulverized Peanuts.


The rest of the ingredients were standard enough for Key Lime Pie: key lime juice, egg yolks, sweetened condensed milk.

Oh yes, there was one other thing.


Sweet crumbly fried bits of porcine belly of salty smoky heaven that is you, dear glorious bacon, joined in a joyous mélange of vibrant tastes, textures and colors

sure to delight the daring and urbane palate of even the most jaded of food sophists.

Let the record show my Bride said “Gack!” and Daughter demurred on trying a piece, citing a previous engagement in the Emergency Room.

It actually wasn’t that bad, really. As I hoped the salty bacon added a pleasing counterpoint to the tartness of the Key Lime and the flavor was rounded out by the subtle banana essence supplied by the Circus Peanuts.

The doctors have promised me a full recovery.

19 Responses to “Quiche Derange”

  1. Laura says:

    OH MY GOD! That looks like heaven in a pie crust! Like the Circus Peanut mixture are big fluffy clouds and the bacon pieces are little angels singing their little salty angel songs. I love it! HA! T-Rex would be proud.

  2. oh, em, gee, dude….

    That looks like…. there are no words. None.

  3. Cripes Suzette says:

    This is a remarkable thing – although at the moment, I am at a loss to come up with a remark.
    Well, ok. It actually doesn’t look bad. I do like how the circus peanut base is able to support the bacon bits for even distribution.

    Bingley, you’re an evil genius.

  4. Ahem. Get help. Before it’s too late.

    The bacon and lime could work without the circus peanuts. Add in a hint of cumin and a bit of tabasco and you’ve almost got Cochinita Pibil! Garnish with cilantro. . .

  5. Mr. Bingley says:

    Suzette, you’ve always been my inspiration!

  6. WunderKraut says:

    You need your own show on the Food Network!

  7. Mr. Bingley says:

    We could call it “S&%# My Dad Cooks”!

  8. tree hugging sister says:

    T-Rex, darlin’ Laura, would be delicately retching his guts out over the side of the carriage like a pregnant Scarlett O’ Hara.

    They’re coming to take you away, Bingley. I should have let them when they wanted to YEARS ago, but I thought I could help.

    EPIC fail. And, in collateral damage, the Circus Peanut industry will melt into oblivion. Damn shame about that as well.

  9. Mr. Bingley says:

    I’ve always wanted to be “epic.”

  10. Laura says:

    MY T-Rex would love it. Being a carnivore he’d relish the bacon especially. Everyone’s T-Rex is different. I learned that in religion class.

  11. Laura says:

    Oh, and you should name it T-Rex Nectar Pie or Clown Pig Pie.

  12. JeffS says:

    “Clown pig pie” sounds good, Laura.

    And I have to admit that while I would taste it, I would also do so cautiously. The recipe sounds…..radical.

  13. Dave E. says:

    Geez, I almost passed out their, Bingley.

  14. Dave E. says:

    Or there, doh!

  15. Kate P says:

    Wow. Looks like a day-glo quiche. I guess that’s the only kind “real men” eat!

  16. lifeshighway says:

    I have to applaud your dedication in creating a circus peanut pie but I have to inquire as to what food group a circus peanut would fall under if it would not melt?

    I always suspected plastic.

  17. Mr. Bingley says:

    Well, according to Laura it would be “ambrosia.”

    For the rest of us, I think you’re on the right track.

  18. Laura would snort the peanut pulverizations if she could.

  19. Laura says:

    HA! Gargs, I so would! Go to work with orange dust all around my nostril, all hyped up…they’d want to drug test me.

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