For Those, Like Moi, Who Hadn’t Seen the Peaceful and Orderly Transfer of Power

Expectedly Unexpected

The “Recovery Summer” rolls on

(Reuters) – The economy created far fewer jobs than expected in December, suggesting the Federal Reserve will complete its asset buying program, but the unemployment rate dropped to its lowest in more than 1-1/2 years.

Non-farm payrolls increased 103,000, the Labor Department said on Friday, below economists’ expectations for 175,000. Private hiring rose 113,000, while government employment fell 10,000.

If you listen closely, what Biden is actually saying is “you won’t get a job ’til you’re 30.”

How Things Should Have Been Done In The House Yesterday

Now where’s that ensign with the red shirt?

(via Ace’s Headlines sidebar)

After Thousands Of Years “Ur” Continues To Vex The Islamic World

First it was “vultURe”

Now, it’s “dentURe”

TEHRAN (Reuters) – Iranian border guards have arrested an American woman on suspicion of spying after she entered the country illegally by land, a semi-official news agency reported on Thursday.

The Fars news agency said an “informed source” had confirmed a report earlier in the day in the daily Iran which said the woman had entered from Armenia and was detained by customs guards in the town of Nordouz in northwestern Iran.

An espionage device was found in her teeth, according to the Iran daily, which is not known for carrying accurate reports.

I blame the Juice

We Need A Fashion “Reset” Button

I know all the cool kids are talking about the photo of the two White House staffers coming off of Air Force One carrying their surfboards, but honestly it’s the other photo posted there that sums up, well, everything about our President (and his staff) who we were/are continually told is the Most Stupendulously Intelligenticle Hipsterian Evah

Look, more often than I will admit I stumble about the house after a night of Dionysian indulgence with my orange cardigan fumbly buttoned like that in the misty morning haze…but I always manage to gussy myself just enough before the cameras start rolling.

And THANK GOD For the MODERATES IN ISLAM

Oh, yeah. You betcha.

Muslim scholars praise killer of Pakistan governor
Gov. Taseer was reportedly shot over his opposition to the country’s blasphemy laws

More than 500 Muslim scholars are praising the man suspected of killing a Pakistani governor because the politician opposed blasphemy laws that mandate death for those convicted of insulting Islam.

The group of scholars and clerics known as Jamat Ahle Sunnat is affiliated with a moderate school of Islam and represents the mainstream Barelvi sect.

The group said in a statement Wednesday that no one should pray for Punjab province Gov. Salman Taseer or express regret for his murder.

Just what we need ~ more mainstream murderous moderates. Nothing like giving the Religion of Pieces an even better name than it has already, I always say. Sharia on, dickweeds.

You’re impressing the hell out of me.

The only thing blaspheming laws ever protect is the haters.

Awwww! It Wooks Wike Somebody’s Down in De Dumps and It Ain’t Nancy Pewosi!

It’s Mr. SUN!!! Oh, NOES!!!!!

But…how can dis be?!?!? No spotses YET?

NOAA will have to wevise their pwediction again?

Oh, NOES!!!!

Does it seem cold in here to you?

The Atlantic Has Assembled Charts

… depicting our painful recessional wanderings.

I wonder if anyone has bothered to eyeball them up Capitol Hill way?

Isn’t It Rich? Aren’t We A Pair?

Me here at last on the ground…

(AFP) – Two street clowns were found dead in southeastern Mexico along with messages allegedly from a drug gang accusing them of working as army informers, their families said Tuesday.

Another 15 people were reported killed in the northern border state of Chihuahua overnight, including a woman who was beheaded, amid rampant drug violence across Mexico which killed more than 12,000 people last year alone.

The clowns were found in bright costumes and makeup on a roadside Sunday in the city of Villahermosa, bearing signs of torture and a message accusing them of being army informers, their families said.

? Because She Wasn’t Seen, Maybe It Wasn’t Her

Even though her point was she wasn’t supposed to be seen to begin with?

Lying black sackcloth swathed example of dramabitchdom receives just desserts in the end and non-racist exasperated cop triumphs.

Man. My head is spinning.

(A warm Swill Salute to The Constitution Club.)

Put Your Seat Trays in Their Upright and Locked Position, and Adjust Your Brain Bucket Crash Helmets Accordingly

…because you just KNOW we’re all about to be bludgeoned to DEATH equally with THESE prices…

Rising oil price threatens fragile recovery

…and by administration zomGOOLSbies chanting THIS little mantra.

…Oil consuming nations, meanwhile, need to accelerate their efforts to reduce their reliance on oil, especially for transportation, he said…

Why call them “zomGOOLSbies”? You know! Because their brains are SOUP! They FORGET “THINGS THAT HAVE HAPPENED BEFORE“!

Inevitably we go back to “stop using ee-ville/almost-running-out-of-it-anyway oil”. As opposed to actually kinda drilling around for, like, enough of our own…

Obama: No New Offshore Oil Drilling in East

…or even just using the wells we’ve already BOUGHT and PAID FOR, for God’s sake.

The Obama administration on Monday eased new environmental barriers to some oil and gas deepwater projects, but companies will still have to meet stringent regulations before drilling resumes.

Oil companies and Republican lawmakers have complained that regulations imposed after the BP oil spill have brought Gulf of Mexico drilling to a standstill.

The department’s decision to waive some environmental requirements comes as Noble Corp announced that Marathon Oil Co. canceled a four-year, $752 million contract for a deepwater rig in the Gulf due to lack of drilling permits.

…While removing one potential obstacle for these companies, it does not automatically mean drilling will begin immediately.

…Since lifting its ban in October on drilling at depths more than 500 feet, the department has yet to approve any new deepwater exploration drilling permits.

So here we are, stuck in the middle with him for a president. Green shoots are few and far between, and those are about to get scorched by the price of petrol, for which, mind you, I GUARANTEE we will be mercilessly harangued by the Nanny-in-Chief (and his ee-ville toadies) that’s it’s all our Goddamn American consumption-driven faults, even though I’ve NEVER been to Spain, NOR Martha’s Vineyard, for that matter. (I will admit to one government funded Hawaii trip. Coming back from a six month rotation to Iwakuni, I got two days fixing airplanes on the flightline in Kaneohe and a whirlwind afternoon trip to Waikiki. WOOPdeef*ckingDOO.) You get my drift. We’re in for lectures galore. And somehow this will all go back to George W Bush NOT finding cold fusion with stem cell funding. Or something. MARK MY WORDS.

Golly. Sometimes I think that hyperbolic hypocrite in the White House just lets stuff simmer ’til it gets so bad he gets his way.

Am I a cynic or just a bitter clinger kinda hater?

Happy New Year News!

Via Meep at POWIP here’s some joyous news on the abysmal black financial hole we are facing.

*Now with Extra Jersey!*

Well, Bummer

As I don’t live in either Idaho or Washington I didn’t win the $330 million Mega prize last night.

So I’m back at work.

I Can’t Wait To See Their “21st Century” Edition Of The Bible

I’m sure they’ll remove all mention of God so as not to offend

What is a word worth? According to Publishers Weekly, NewSouth Books’ upcoming edition of Mark Twain’s seminal novel Adventures of Huckleberry Finn will remove all instances of the “n” word—I’ll give you a hint, it’s not nonesuch—present in the text and replace it with slave. The new book will also remove usage of the word Injun. The effort is spearheaded by Twain expert Alan Gribben, who says his PC-ified version is not an attempt to neuter the classic but rather to update it. “Race matters in these books,” Gribben told PW. “It’s a matter of how you express that in the 21st century.”

This may be the only time you will ever here me approvingly quote Pa. Gov. Ed Rendell, but what a freakin’ bunch of wussies we’ve become.

How Could He Refuse?

I can’t speak for you, but I sure know that if someone named “Goodluck Jonathan” asked me to do something well by gum I’d listen to him

Ivory Coast’s political crisis remains deadlocked despite a mediation attempt by African leaders, President Goodluck Jonathan of Nigeria has said.

“There is still a stalemate,” Mr Jonathan, who heads the West African bloc Ecowas, told reporters after talks with envoys who on Monday met the two men claiming Ivory Coast’s presidency.

The UN regards Alassane Ouattara as the winner of November’s poll but incumbent Laurent Gbagbo refuses to cede power.

Bride’s At Work, Daughter’s At School

I’m at home and it’s lunch time

I may have another glass of wine.

Or three.

Now That the Retail Blitzkrieg Has Released Me From My Seasonal Bondage

…I can put up this Christmas dinner’s bloody beef pictures!!!
I know you all can hardly wait!!

Well, some control their anticipation better than others. After all, it truly is unseemly to slobber around strangers and a wet keyboard is always awkward when you have guests, but I hope ALL the interlopers have left, because it’s a Prime Rib Primer time once again.

Oven to 450°
Start with a magic mix of equal parts garlic powder, onion powder, and thyme.

To that add half as much sugar, arrowroot and ground celery seed. Mix well together. (This year, since Ebola the Raptor was able to make it home, we had a four rib, almost 7 pound prime rib, so my mix about filled 2 ounces of my 4 ounce Fire King ramekin.)
Then whap yourself up a carrot or two, chunk a large onion and about four cloves of garlic (I just peel and smash). Scatter them around the bottom of a roasting pan a size bigger than your roast.

Nestle your piece o’ beef on his veggies, schmear with magic mix, then salt and pepper LIBERALLY. (Now, we had to get some fat from Publix to cover his gorgeous butt, because, for some inconceivable reason, the Commissary decided to scrape ALL the fat off the top of the prime ribs this year. W.T.F, over?)

We use a constant read thermometer always. Insert said device now and pop him in the oven for 20 minutes, then reduce the temp to 325°. He’s going to stay in there, UNMOLESTED, until his internals are about 115° for a medium rare roast. In the meantime, major dad sends…

“For the scallops; soy sauce, couple of shakes of sesame seed oil, two table spoons garlic chili paste, mix in a bowl, lightly pepper the scallops and put them in the mix, marinate for about an hour turning a couple of times.”

“Fire the grill to high heat, place scallops on the grill, they should make noise if the grill is hot enough, grill 2 1/2 minutes per side depending on how big they are. DO NOT overcook unless you like superballs, serve and enjoy!”

Slaving over unruly scallops and a hot grill is hard work, so a ‘tini was called for to get my schweet hubby through the rest of the grueling tasks ahead of him. Like what to drink with dinner.

(To quote the Knight Templar, “he chose wisely”.)

We had yummy mashed ‘tatoes and broccoli, plus major dad’s dee-VINE Caesar salad to get together while the roast chugged along. I also got the beer steamed shrimps done and cooling down for our traditional first course shrimp cocktail.

I set the alarm on the thermometer for an internal of 85° to give me a heads up time to start all the other last minute balls rolling.
(Not ENOUGH balls rolling for SOME people around here…)

When the internal temp hits your target, pull the beast out and set him on a carving board, UNMOLESTED. He will rise internally another 15° to 25°, believe it or not. Also, try NOT to lift him out of the pan using a fork, because those poke wounds will let juices run free that you’ll wish you had later. There’s also a debate about tenting with aluminum foil versus not ~ we did (loosely) this year, since we knew it would be a while before we got around to slicing. The crust did NOT go to complete sog, either. Also, this year we weren’t messing with either a Yorkshire Pudding or an au jus, so I simply deglazed with Swanson’s organic beef broth ~ stuff’s great. All the veggie’s have caramelized, plus you have all the beef fond from the roast and the herb mix ~ it’s awful hard keeping your puddies out of the roasting pan to get anything done!

Mash those puppies in the strainer and get every last bit of yummy out! I used a Knorr brown gravy mix, since it has very little taste on it’s own to interfere with the flavors I’d gotten from the roast. Plus, I pour the juices that’ve accumulated off the carving board into the saucepan as well. Don’t waste a single drop of all your hard work.

Now, we serve our formal meals in stages. First the seafood…

…then major dad’s beautiful salads and finally, at long last, the BIG KNIFE comes out.
And we FEAST.

And we are BLESSED. Every one.

I hope you all were, too.

Pete Postlethwaite Has Died

And a grand actor he was. You’ll know his gnarled face from a million things, I’m thinking, like “Inception” and “Usual Suspects”. But Ebola and I have always loved…and reviled…him for one role years ago ~ Obadiah Hakeswill. And we’ve never identified him by his given name when we’ve seen him in another role since, but by how malevolently he says the lead character’s name (Lt. Richard Sharpe played by Sean Bean) in the British series Sharpe’s Rifles:

“Sharpie“

(As in, “Didn’t Sharpie play the part of the banker in the movie?”)

God speed, Mr. Postlethwaite and we thank you. You were something, sir.

Twins?

Claude

Eric’s dog

It’s comforting to know other humans have been domesticated as I have.

Our Crazy Hot Potato Mortgage System

In September I decided to refinance our mortgage; rates had fallen so low that I could basically convert our 30 year fixed (which still had 25 or so years left) into a 15 year fixed for only a tad more per month. So I checked with the folks who held our mortgage, Wells Fargo, to see what that could do. They offered a moderately interesting rate, but under proper prodding from my Bride we decided to go the Lending Tree route and see what the Open Market™ offered.

Geesh. Once the form was submitted I started getting tons of calls and emails from various potential lenders offering a whole range of packages, most of which were far superior to Wells Fargo’s in terms of both the interest rate and the fees. Long story short I decided to go with a local firm here in Jersey who gave us a great deal and I liked the idea that I was giving my business to (as Jim would say) my Jersey Peeps.

Of course, this being the fast-and-furious fluid mortgage business they flipped our mortgage and sold it to some firm in Louisiana. No biggie; we sent the new folks the January payment.

And we just got a letter from them saying that they too have now sold our mortgage to yet another firm, so for our February payment we should send our check to the new holder of our mortgage.

Wells Fargo.

Oh, How I LOVE Happy Endings!

Go FROGS!

Happy New Year, Swillers!!!

In 2011…

…may the Golden Pelican of Happiness drop only good things from above you.