Good News!

A former fox is now in charge of the hen house

WASHINGTON (AP) – A Goldman Sachs executive has been named the first chief operating officer of the Securities and Exchange Commission’s enforcement division.

The market watchdog agency said Friday that Adam Storch, vice president in Goldman Sachs’ Business Intelligence Group, is assuming the new position of managing executive of the SEC division.

What could possibly go wrong?

Normally It’s Called a “Do Over”

But I’m thinking it’s a little late. Thanks anyway, losers.

U.S. spy agencies are considering whether to rewrite a controversial 2007 intelligence report that asserted Tehran halted its efforts to build nuclear weapons in 2003, current and former U.S. intelligence officials say.

The intelligence agencies’ rethink comes as pressure is mounting on Capitol Hill, and among U.S. allies, for the Obama administration to redo the 2007 assessment, after a string of recent revelations about Tehran’s nuclear program.

Oh, wait! Goofy moi.

The “losers” are us.

Urban Legion?

Remember, all you pajama-clad racist fools, the CBS and AP journos are the proffessionals

Posted: Friday, 16 October 2009 7:25AM

NJ Gang Warning Text Considered ‘Urban Legion’

NEWARK, N.J. (AP) — Police in northern New Jersey believe recent text messages warning about an upcoming gang initiation is nothing but an urban legend.

The text, sent to dozens of high school students in Newark and Elizabeth, warns “Oct. 21st starts gang initiation week they are rumored to try to kill 140 Woman.PLZ FORWARD This can save our women!”

Now back to our regularly scheduled clinging.

Curse You, Chimpy!

We were promised blessed eternal summer

… WINTER WEATHER ADVISORY NOW IN EFFECT UNTIL 11 AM EDT THIS MORNING…

THE WINTER WEATHER ADVISORY IS NOW IN EFFECT UNTIL 11 AM EDT THIS MORNING.

A COASTAL LOW SPREAD SNOW OVER THE HIGHER TERRAIN… AND RAIN AND SNOW IN THE VALLEYS… ACROSS THE REGION. SNOW ACCUMULATIONS ACROSS THE REGION HAVE AVERAGED 1 TO 4 INCHES THURSDAY AND THURSDAY NIGHT… WITH THE HIGHEST AMOUNTS ON THE POCONO PLATEAU IN PENNSYLVANIA.

I must buy a bigger car and do my sacred duty to warm the cockles of Gaia’s heart.

Resident Evil

Monstrous, ignorant evil.

$1 million bond in dead baby case
18-month-old found dead in trash weighed only 11 pounds; other siblings recovering

No family members or friends showed up to support the 21-year-old. She is accused of stuffing the body of one of her twin daughters — 18-month-old Myleahya Woods — in a trash can. She also is accused of neglecting her other daughter, Mykayhla, and her 2-year-old son, Jaterius.

…An autopsy was performed on Myleahya, but the results have not been released. The child weighed only 11 pounds, far underweight for her age.

…Being left unattended for a few days wouldn’t account completely for Myleahya’s condition.

“Left unattended” needs to be explained:

…Christian R. Woods, 21, is suspected of leaving her children home alone from 10 a.m. Saturday to 9:30 a.m. Monday. When Woods returned, she found Myleahya Woods, 1, dead and put her body in the trash, the Escambia County Sheriff’s Office said.

…The siblings were left alone at a home that doesn’t have electricity or running water. Jell-O cups were left in the living room for the children to eat while the mother was away, Morgan said.

Wow, The Dollar Is Getting Pounded

…by the Pound this morning; it’s out .0304 to 1.6268. It’s pretty flat vs the euro.

On a related note, you may be interested in this story.

Mashed ‘Taters With Bacon And Feta

It’s what’s for dinner.

Yummy.

Statistic of the Day

…for those in the giant inflatable home-is-my-castle owning business.

…St. Charles [IL], population 40,000, now has 74 homes for sale with buyers asking more than $1 million.

Needless to say, I don’t even know where that IS, less mind live anywhere close.

Talk About Your Asset

…appreciation!

The ghost of a fingerprint in the top left corner of an obscure portrait appears to have confirmed an extraordinary art discovery: an unrecognized painting by Leonardo da Vinci.

…The 13 x 9in picture in chalk, pen and ink appeared at auction at Christie’s, New York, in 1998, catalogued as “German school, early 19th century.” It sold for $19,000. Now a growing number of leading art experts agree that it is almost certainly by Leonardo da Vinci and worth about $157 million.

Bu-Bu-Bu-Bu-Bu-Barack’s Greatest Hits

No music required, but TOTUS? Oh, mos def.

The Scales Of Justice…

Fail the fish

PORTLAND, Ore. – A Portland man who attacked his ex-girlfriend and impaled her pet fish this summer has been sentenced to two years probation, a psychological evaluation and community service. Donald Earl Fite III, 27, pleaded guilty Tuesday to animal abuse and domestic violence assault.

And just what exactly did this pesce ex-boyfriend do?

According to court records, Sarah Harris had broken up with Fite but returned to her Portland apartment July 25 to find him lying on her bed, saying he wanted to get back together.

He could no longer sleep with her, so he wanted to sleep with the fish?

When Harris tried to leave, Fite shoved her against a wall, grabbed her hair and tossed her against a bathtub.

Harris fled but returned with an officer to find her fish — a bright purple betta named “DeLorean” — on the wood floor with a knife through it.

According to court records, Fite quickly admitted killing the fish, telling police: “If she can’t have me, then she can’t have the fish.”

This almost reads like a Detective Paco novel, doesn’t it?

Fite’s attorney, Tom Macnair, said Tuesday that killing the fish was a “very low point” in his client’s life.

It was also a very low point in the fish’s life.

Harris did not attend the hearing. In a phone interview with The Oregonian newspaper, she recalled crying hysterically when she saw the fish with a knife sticking through it.

“Donald bought the fish for me, and I’m sure he knew how much I cared for it,” she said.

And how much you loved sushi.

Prosecutor Eric Zimmerman told Judge Eric Bergstrom that Harris plans to get a memorial tattoo of the fish and wanted Fite to pay for it. Bergstrom, however, declined to make Fite pay restitution for the tattoo.

The judge ordered Fite to stay away from Harris, but said he could have contact with fish.

The Rev. Al Carpton is organizing a protest and asking other fish to stay home from their schools today and join him to fight this outrage.

“We’ve had it up to our gills with this discrimination” he declared.

(h/t Dan Collins)

(Oh damn! The Miracle CrackWhip Addict beat me to this!)

Just Because

Because we need a little Christmas,
Right this very minute…

Rich Lowry

…today.

Pres. Barack Obama deserved the Nobel Peace Prize. That’s an indictment, not a compliment. Rather than living up to the honor, it should be Obama’s mission to show he’s thoroughly unworthy of it.

We can dream…

Parts Is Parts, I Guess

But I somehow can’t reconcile this story with the creed of “First, do no harm”

LONDON, England (CNN) — A leading UK hospital has defended its practice of using organs donated by smokers after the death of a soldier who received the cancerous lungs of a heavy smoker.

Corporal Matthew Millington, 31, died at his home in 2008, less than a year after receiving a transplant that was supposed to save his life at Papworth Hospital — the UK’s largest specialist cardiothoracic hospital, in Cambridgeshire, east England.

Papworth Hospital released a statement saying using donor lungs from smokers was not “unusual.”

The statement added that the hospital had no option but to use lungs from smokers as “the number of lung transplants carried out would have been significantly lower,” if they didn’t.

Words fail at that last paragraph.

This is Nationalized Health Care for you.

Country, For Sale Or Rent

Auction Brittannia

The British government will sell off a raft of state assets, Prime Minister Gordon Brown was to say Monday as he bids to reclaim the initiative on reducing recession-hit Britain’s debt.

The government is to sell off 16 billion pounds (25.4 billion dollars, 17.2 billion euros) of assets, Brown was to say, according to extracts from a keynote speech to be given London, setting out his vision for “enduring and sustainable growth.”

Brown was to outline details of initial sales that could raise three billion pounds, including the Channel Tunnel linking Britain to France; the 33 percent stake in European uranium corsortium URENCO; the Tote bookmakers; the River Thames crossings at Dartford, east of London; and the Student Loans Company.

…The government will also sell off surplus real estate as market conditions improve.

He doesn’t say anything about spending less money, though, an omission his opponents clearly notice

A Conservative spokesman said: “As any family knows, selling off things helps in the short-term and, given the state the country is in, is probably necessary but it is no substitute for a long-term plan to get the country to live within its means.”

Um, Major Dad?

Dude.

Hoosier Daddy now?

Sorry ‘Bout The Game, Dave

But this is a great photo of the Yanks as Teixeira’s rope left the Stadium

An exciting end to a sadly very frustrating game for the Twins.

Sharing

…can be cathartic.

What A Joke

He’s been in office 9 months and has done nothing much

(CNN) — President Obama was awarded the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize on Friday.

Less than nine months into his presidency, Barack Obama has been awarded the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize.

The first African-American to win the White House, Obama was praised by the Norweigan Nobel Committee for “his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples.”

“Only very rarely has a person to the same extent as Obama captured the world’s attention and given its people hope for a better future,” the committee said. “His diplomacy is founded in the concept that those who are to lead the world must do so on the basis of values and attitudes that are shared by the majority of the world’s population.”

I mean, seriously, has he brokered a peace between a warring people? Has he defeated an evil foe and freed an oppressed people? Name one thing his “diplomacy” has accomplished. Has he been able to get his agenda passed in a country where his party holds decisive majorities in both houses of Congress?

Update: Look here for some of the other nominees who sure as hell made bigger sacrifices than someone who flew to Copenhagen and talked about themselves in a failed bid to get the Olympics.

Has the Onion taken over the Nobel Institute?

The Taliban

…write an alumni letter.

…Look, its time to realize that woman aren’t people. They just repeat yesterday all over again each day. If you listen to their conversations, you will note the absence of verbs. They can’t do life. They can’t do Earth. You shouldn’t have all your staff positions occupied by non-humans. It shows in your Alumnus magazine. Fake nonsense is not a good idea.

Class of ‘65

Moronic Quote of the Day

“This is the first accountability system for school meals in the history of the school system,” Stein said. “It’s very exciting.”

They’ve lost their minds, and every “parent” (quotation marks because, obviously, they’re not, outside of giving semen, egg and birth) should be writhing in shame.

I have no idea, union or not, how ANY educator in the country stays in their job anymore. It’s ludicrous.

Finches, people.

Well, This Is Not Surprising News

I mean, just look at Hollywood couples

Low-quality females prefer low-quality males, at least in the avian world.

This is according to research published in the Royal Society journal Proceedings B, testing female zebra finches’ taste in males.

As adults, the low-quality females showed a preference for the songs of males of the same quality, and for the male birds themselves.

To show you how out-of-touch these researchers are, get a load of this:

Evolutionary biologists previously thought that females would always opt for the best male available.

A conversation with any High School-aged male would have quickly dissuaded them of that fool notion…

We All Know Why Woody Allen Supports Polanksi

And now I guess we know why the French “Culture Minister” signed the petition, too

France’s Culture Minister Frederic Mitterrand is facing intense pressure over a book he wrote that described paying for “young boys” in Thailand.

The book was written four years ago, before he joined the government, but is back in the headlines following his impassioned support for Roman Polanski.

Polanski has been arrested in Switzerland on child sex charges.

Mr Mitterrand, nephew of former President Francois Mitterrand, has come under attack from right and left.

In his 1995 book The Bad Life, he wrote: “I got into the habit of paying for boys,” saying his attraction to young male prostitutes was not dimmed despite knowing “the sordid details of this traffic”.

“All these rituals of the market for youths, the slave market excited me enormously… the abundance of very attractive and immediately available young boys put me in a state of desire.”

“The Bad Life” indeed.

In his defense, Mr. Mitterrand called Polanski’s behavior callous and horrifying.

Oh wait, that’s what he said about the US:

Mr Mitterrand said the US’ behaviour, in seeking his (Polanski’s) extradition, was callous and “horrifying”.

But you see this is all some sort of Right Wing Vendetta against the poor fellow, you see

Mr Mitterrand, 62, has denied being a paedophile, saying the term “boys” was used loosely.

That ain’t all that was “used loosely.”

Ho Boy

BREAKING: Senate GOP Folding Over Health Care Reform

I am told quite reliably that in a meeting today on Capitol Hill, Republican Senators began to rapidly move toward concessions on health care because they are afraid they cannot hold their members. Some Republicans are now thinking of supporting a government program.

From Redstate

REAL Pirates…

…are laughing their bony asses off.

Top 5 blunders of Somali pirates
Somali pirates attacked a French Navy ship by accident Tuesday night. Five suspects are in custody.

Of course, it WAS the French and they’re sneaky bastards.

Was it the croissants, strong tobacco, French roast or Carla Bruni warbling over the loudspeakers that lured them in?

I’ll bet they never tell us.