Spam Of The Day

“Where can i find your rss? I cant find it”

I think it was left by a TSA agent…

Headline Of The Day

From my local Asbury Park Press

“Fate of South Brunswick man accused of strangling parents now in hands of jury”

A Deadly Gas Attack of the Twelfth Magnitude

Steve Litton/Small Business Owner: “My customers expect that when I bill them, I’m giving them a complete and accurate bill. Well, I expect that when I get my gas bill, I’m getting a complete and accurate bill.”

But the city owned monopoly was not giving him accurate bills. They weren’t charging him sales tax.
After a state auditor caught the error, the city is asking for all of that money back, 4 years worth.
A total of over 5 thousand bucks.

…And Litton is not alone 257 businesses are being asked to pay up.

Steve is a friend of mine, not to mention the guy who picks up major dad’s drycleaning on Mondays at work. He’s understandably really PISSED.

I don’t get this at all. I have to fill out my piddling little Florida sales tax return EVERY quarter and send the few pennies I’ve gleaned for the collective in to the state coffers. If I DON’T, the State Department of Revenue comes after ths, not the person who bought the glass from me at the Gallery Night in July. After ME. ESP should be taking this $345,000 f*ck-up in the shorts, not trying a legal slam on people who paid their bills like good girls and boys every month. Do you know they even tried to hardball Steve, telling him he’d claimed a “tax-free” exemption, so it was all his fault? He called their bullsh*t just about that fast (I wonder if they tried that line on the other 256 businesses, too, just to see what’d stick…), so it was back to “pay or die” by the end of the conversation, anyway.

The other business in the WEARTV report “owes” over ELEVEN GRAND, but they’re a small restaurant chain out of south Florida. Why do I think that should make a difference?

Because I’m hoping they can afford they lawyer that Steve can’t.

We Would Most Assuredly Have a Problem

…and I would most ASSUREDLY make the news.

Just read Comment Number Three and tell me what you think you’d do.

Or want your mum to do.

I Get Teary Eyed Just Watching the Sheer Joy On Their Little Faces

The miracle that is PUMPKINS.

Should Lightening Strike and I Give Up Worshipping Rocks and Trees

…I’ve found my alternative place in Religion Land. Alcohol (well, the bottles anyway), exceptional good humor, recycling and beautiful music?

Shove over in the third row there, you.

Zing!

Despite his weakened health Cheney’s tongue is as sharp as ever

Cheney, who (unlike Mr. Bush) has been a vocal critic of President Obama, also took a shot at the current administration. Speaking of his expectation that construction would move quickly on the presidential center following the groundbreaking, Cheney quipped that “this may be the only shovel ready project in America.” The reference was to the Obama-supported stimulus package that Republicans have criticized as ineffective. (perhaps because it, er, um, has been completely useless)

I admit it. I giggled.

Bound and Determined to CRAWL UP YOUR ASS: Your $198 Round Trip Ticket Through TSA Hell

…NOW also guarantees you one front row seat in a police state if you choose not to be molested and decide to go home.

The Transportation Security Administration has opened an investigation targeting John Tyner, the Oceanside man who left Lindbergh Field under duress on Saturday morning after refusing to undertake a full body scan.

…Aguilar cautioned against the scanner boycott. He said he is aware of a backlash.

“Let me paraphrase our new administrator, John Pistole,” said Aguilar. “It really is irresponsible to encourage anyone to opt out of a technology that is there in place specifically to protect the public.”

In late October, TSA added another layer of security, the resolution pat-down, which requires TSA agents to grasp the body of the subject more firmly when running hands over limbs and also requires probing up to the genital areas of the body.

Aguilar said that once a passenger enters the security area, there is a legal obligation to follow through with the process.

REALLY? Is there?

Come Join Me! Dance With Me!

Heart-ache: Teary Dems grieve on house floor as GOP celebrates

Freshman Rep. Debbie Halvorson (D-Ill.), who lost her reelection bid, wiped away tears as she hugged fellow members of the class of 2008, many of whom lost on Nov. 2.

I mean, really ~ you want to, you know.

I have…HAPPY FEEEEETTTTTT !!!!!!!

Gimme Those

Rolls-Royce to Take Back A380 Engines from Airbus

Engine maker Rolls-Royce has asked Airbus to return some Airbus A380 engines from production lines so it can use them to replace faulty turbines on airplanes already in service, Airbus said.

Awkwards, no?

As if the prospect of having the TenaciouslySalaciousAttendants groping your nether regions alone wasn’t enough to discourage flying. **sigh**

Vis-à-vis “opt out”: Can you put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on your ass?

Lame Duck Dems To Try Nightmare

Oops I meant DREAM

‘READY’ ON IMMIGRATION: Sen. Bob Menendez (D-N.J.) told reporters on Monday that he might meet with President Obama this week to talk about a way to pass immigration legislation during Congress’s lame-duck session.

“The White House is ready and willing, and we may be having another meeting with the White House very soon this week,” Menendez said on a conference call, adding that Obama is “clearly interested” trying to reach a deal on immigration before the Congress convenes.

“He made it clear that he is willing to move forward if there is bipartisan support,” Menendez said. “We need some clear response from some of our Republican colleagues.”

Here’s a “clear response” for you: “HELL NO!”

The Repubs in the Senate must show some cojones and stop this.

Some Over Night Ugliness Developing?

Ireland resisting a bailout

Greece is biting the hand that feeds it…historically never a good move when the hand is attached to a German

Portugal says “Um, we’re broke too”

I’m guessing our Super Genius Response™ will be…PRINT MONEY!

I know I’m a pessimist, but this is serious shit.

And we simply do not have serious, credible leadership.

If Obamacare Is So Wonderful

Why are they handing out so many exemptions?

There is something elementally corrupt about exempting certain groups from laws.

So, We Watched “Sarah Palin’s Alaska” Tonight

Loved it. It was funny, entertaining, really enjoyed the shots at their new novelist neighbor (Oh, yeah!), plenty of breathtaking scenery and Palin has no problem ~ when she’s sans “bouffant” hair ~ being sans make-up as well, bless her heart.

Verdict? Miss PretentiousBitch from the NY Post can go suck a Snooki stone.

QE2 Primer

When two care bears have a better grasp of the economy than any governmental economist we are completely screwed.

Atque in Perpetuum, Frater, Ave Aque Vale

He died the day before the Marine Corps birthday.

A Marine officer killed Tuesday in Afghanistan was the son of Marine Lt. Gen. John F. Kelly, well known on Capitol Hill as a former legislative aide to the commandant of the Marine Corps.

The Pentagon announced Wednesday morning that Kelly’s son, Lt. Robert M. Kelly, was killed in combat in Helmand province. Kelly enlisted in the Marine Corps in September 2003 and received his commission in December 2008; he was killed during his third combat deployment.

His brother is a Marine Corps captain and will be escorting his brother home. His dad has sent an incredibly poignant email to friends with details of Robert’s Arlington funeral and it’s very hard to read. Very hard. And so personal to their horrific loss on our behalf, that I won’t share any of it, but one thing. One gut-wrenching thing: the subject line. It simply says:

My Boy

Semper Fidelis, 1stLt. Kelly.

Thank you.

Let’s Play America’s Favorite Media Game!

Yes, it’s time for another episode of “Name That Party!”

Just after 10:12 a.m. Friday, Leslie Johnson frantically phoned her husband, Jack B. Johnson, the Prince George’s county executive.

Two FBI agents were at the front door of their two-story brick colonial in Mitchellville.

“Don’t answer it,” the county executive said, unaware that more agents were listening in.

Johnson ordered his wife to find and destroy a $100,000 check from a real estate developer that was hidden in a box of liquor.

“Do you want me to put it down the toilet?” Leslie Johnson asked.

“Yes, flush that,” the county executive said.

But what about the cash? she asked – $79,600.

Put it in your underwear, the county executive told his wife.

She replied, “I have it in my bra” – which is where agents discovered the money after she answered the door.

That conversation, as documented in an FBI affidavit, led to the arrest Friday of Jack Johnson and his wife. Each was charged with evidence tampering and destroying evidence in a case the U.S. attorney called the “tip of the iceberg” in a broader corruption investigation in Prince George’s.

In the entire story his affiliation is never mentioned. There is one other elected official mentioned and they do put his affiliation up

The arrests stunned Maryland’s political world, in which Jack Johnson has been a player for a generation. Maryland Gov. Martin O’Malley (D) described it as a “sad day for Prince George’s County and for County Executive Johnson and his family.”

But then, of course, he’s not the one arrested along with his wife for corruption and bribery.

Update: I see Dan reads the wrong paper.

What Is He Smoking?

Stewart, Stewart…picking my Cavs as his “Upset Winners”???

Maryland (6-3) at Virginia (4-5)
UPSET SPECIAL: It was fun while it lasted for the Terrapins, who started 6-2 and came within 37 seconds of winning at Miami last weekend. But Maryland, with its 101st-ranked offense, has little margin for error. Virginia, which posted a breakthrough win against Miami two weeks ago and put up 48 points on Duke last week in defeat, is well suited to winning a low-scoring contest.

Read the first half of that last line again: Virginia scored 48 points last week…and still lost.

“At That Price It’s A Vahzz”

One of my favorite childhood memories was descending from our rural redoubt in the wilds of early 70s North-West Jersey with THS and Mountain Man to go shopping for a Christmas gift for the Parental Units. We were wearing our usual attire of “weathered” flannel shirts, smudgey jeans and mud bespattered work boots as we made the hour-plus drive to a high-falutin store. Our folks had a soft spot for Asian art, so we were looking for something along those lines as we sauntered in under the watchful eye of Reginald Hornbeam III, Esq. who was all nattily put together and not at all amused that we, who put the “riff” into “raff,” would even presume to enter his fine establishment. We looked around a bit, found something we thought might do the trick, and asked him “Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?” “how much is this vase?”

To which he sniffed somewhat dismissively, well, actually, exceedingly dismissively, at us “At that price it’s a vahzzz.”

So Sis pulled out a big wad of twenties and bought it.

What brought this to mind was this

The pair were clearing out their parents’ house in Pinner, Middlesex, after the elderly couple’s death, when they found the vase.

They put it aside, on top of a bookcase, as they continued to deal with the rest of their parents’ property.

It was only later that they decided it might be worth something and decided to to put it up for auction.

They took it to the local auctioneer Bainbridges, in nearby Ruislip, who were in turn excited by the find and valued it at between £800,000 and £1.2m.

However, no one expected the reaction from Chinese buyers, who pushed the bidding up over 30 frenzied minutes to a world record £43m.

By the end of the auction, the price was increasing in £1m chunks as the final few bidders – understood to be mainland Chinese businessmen – vied for the vase.

At one point, the sister selling it almost passed out from the rising value and had to leave the room for some fresh air.

The 18th century Qianlong-dynasty porcelain piece is believed to have fetched the highest price for any Chinese artwork ever sold at auction.

The total price, including commission and VAT on the commission, was £53,105,000.

I’ve got to start searching attics…

Spam Of The Day

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It Was A Dark And Stormy Night

Actually, it was pretty clear and a touch on the chilly side outside; inside the restaurant it was dark (and the cell phone camera was crappy) but the oysters were damned yummy

Three dozen sweet briny tasty glurpy oodles of pearlescent Old Testament Sin.

If this is “unclean”, well, I say bring it.

Thanks, Vets

Take a moment to thank a Veteran today.

Taking No Calls from This Point On, As We’re Celebrating the Marine Corps Birthday

…in time honored casa de major dad fashion ~ watching a CLASSIC.

“All right, sweethearts, what are you waiting for? Breakfast in bed? Another glorious day in the Corps! A day in the Marine Corps is like a day on the farm. Every meal’s a banquet! Every paycheck a fortune! Every formation a parade! I LOVE the Corps!“

Our sentiments exactly. Sweet dreams, y’all.

And Semper Fi.

I Know the Dude’s Busy, BUT

I’m just sayin’ if it’s true, yo.

@adamsbaldwin RT @SamValley “It’s the close of business hours on the east coast, & Obama didn’t wish the USMC a happy 235th birthday.”~ h/t @chuck_dizzle

Thanks to Crusader for the heads up. I’m curious, though.

If the sh*t goes south during his cruise down memory lane, who’s he calling to get his ass outta there, hmm?

Two Hundred and Thirty Five Years Ago Today, the Congress of the United States of America Authorized RAISING HELL

…on our enemies and using Devil Dogs to do it. OO-RAH!!

JOURNAL OF THE CONTINENTAL CONGRESS
(Philadelphia) Friday, November 10, 1775

…Resolved, That two battalions of Marines be raised consisting of one colonel, two lieutenant-colonels, two majors, and other officers, as usual in other regiments; that they consist of an equal number of privates with other battalions; that particular care be taken that no persons be appointed to office, or enlisted into said battaions but such as are good seamen, or so acquainted with maritime affairs as to be able to serve with advantage by sea when required; that they be enlisted and commissioned to serve for and during the present War with Great Britain and the colonies, unless dismissed by order of Congress; that they be distinguished by names of First and Second Battalions of American Marines, and that they be considered as part of the number which the Continental Army before Boston is ordered to consist of.

Ordered, That a copy of the above be transmitted to the General.

HAPPY 235th Birthday to my BELOVED United States Marine Corps!!!!

Happy birthday to ALL my brothers and sisters in that magnificent and much cherished uniform: from my grandfather standing in his leggings on a cliff overlooking the Nicaraguan jungle during the Banana Wars, two uncles and my jaunty Marine Corps aviator father, the Grinch, to my much adored major dad…

…little brother Mountain Man, much loved cosmic twin, Kcruella, brand-new Marine nephew Scott (Ave’s son -we’ve SO PROUD, OO-RAH!!) and a wealth of friends for life, like Skyler, That1Guy, Robb Allen… lots of Leathernecks you all’ve never met. And, like CrabApple Rob’s Sgt. Sam, many Marines I’ve never met, but they so touch your heart all the same. Because they ARE all the same, the second you hear that, “Marine? Really? Me, too! When were/was you/he in?” And off the conversation goes, unintelligible to the casual listener, but absolutely riveting to the old Jarhead listening to the seastory at the time, once bonafides are established, because he’s chomping at the bit to see that yarn and raise it five. “The one that got away” taken to the nth degree.

It’s a Marine thing, utterly and completely.

And I would wish, utterly and completely, that whatever you do in your busy day today, if you might take a second out of it to send a prayer and quiet blessings to those Marines in harm’s way, and there are so many of them. Ask whatever spirit guides you in this world ~ be it God or just the incredible energy that swirls around this Mother Ship we abide on ~ that it focus on those young faces….ALL those faces and keep them safe from the horrors they encounter every day. (And especially watch over our close friends like Skyler, cranky as he is, who’s soon to head back into the fray in that Marine Corps uniform of his. He still has humor lessons to complete!)

So raise a glass, Devil Dogs, and those who love them.

To the CORPS!

Semper Fidelis

If you can, please.
If you have, THANK you.